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Hello. Right now we are looking at different ways to care for my mother. Brief background - 70 yrs old, glioblastoma, severe mobility issues, in December fell at home and broke her hip. Had surgery and now in rehab.


The team and I are thinking ahead to eventual discharge. The plan was always for Mom to be at home and never nursing home. At the moment we only qualify for aides 8 hours a day, 7 days a week. In process of trying to get more hours with NHTD program but approval takes several months.


Social worker at our law firm suggested we try an adult daycare, respite like services for Mom. During the day she would get care outside of the home with DALs and then be at home nights. At nights we could use her allowed 8 hours then and have an aide.


Am I failing as a caregiver or selfish if I do this?

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Thank you everyone for your support and feedback. All is appreciated!
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Reply to Dixiedoodle
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Medicaid may help with Daycare depending on Moms income. Moms Daycare opened at 9am, closed at 2:30. They picked her up and dropped her off. You could call around and see if there are any that go to 5 or 6. Mom had breakfast and lunch there. Also some PT.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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I think I posted somewhere that I wished there was a place I could leave my mom for the day, if your mom is up to it it sounds like a great idea. But I question whether someone with such high needs would qualify for daycare.
What does your mother want? And do you have hospice?
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Reply to cwillie
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I agree wholeheartedly with Smeshque. There is no question of "failing" or anything like that, just doing the very best you can with the time and energy you have to care for your mother to the best of your ability. She is lucky to have such a loving child.
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Reply to SnoopyLove
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I know that some others will have some better advice. I just wanted to say that I think that you are doing what you need to do to help keep your Mom at home. That is commendable.
Care giving is hard in every way whether you have help or go it alone. So if that is what you feel you need to do to maintain your optimum so that you can provide your Mom her optimum, then you choose wisely.
May God bless you.
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Reply to smeshque
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