For about 4 years now my husband seems to have given up so he just kind of drinks beer every single day and when he gets depressed enough he’ll drink hard alcohol. I believe his liver has cirrhosis, he has a hernia that sticks out of his umbilical area about the size of a cantaloupe and his stomach is kind of hard. He says he’s in pain here and there but he’ll turn around and say it’s just his tooth. He also will not has not showered going on for quite some time now. My husband this past couple of months has been sleeping every I would say 20 minutes to half hour because he’s so tired. He seems like he’s talking in his sleep now because he he goes into a deep deep sleep and he doesn’t even hear what’s going on around him when he’s sleeping. There are times when it seems like OK he’s doing better but then he falls back into my worry zone I have called the ambulance him at which time he refuse service I have called the ambulance again where they did decide to take him but he refused service at the hospital and started to walk home so I took his oxygen level which is 81 with a pulse of 93 it goes up to 88 sometimes for the oxygen but then it goes back down he hasn’t shaven or bathed he doesn’t do anything but sit on the couch and watch TV and drink beer every day beer beer beer. He is an alcoholic he wants to drink hard alcohol but he hasn’t yet so I’m praying he doesn’t I feel so bad for him because he makes this noise that sort of sounds like he’s going Ahhhhhh, I don’t know it’s like a gasping for air because when you make that sound you’re actually breathing out but he’s doing it more and more and more and I don’t understand why he’s doing it he’s not cold to touch and he gets angry at me every time I try to tell him to go to the doctor or shower I am concerned I don’t know what to really do I love my husband but he won’t get any help I don’t know what to do any suggestions would be helpful.
The cantaloupe sized lump your husband has plus his hard stomach may be a distended liver due to his drinking. He is a wreck and is happy to sink everyone along with his ship. You can't let this happen. Your being there to help him has obviously not made an impact. You want him to get better more than he wants it for himself. Your compassion may actually be co-dependency and enabling. Please make a boundary and have him leave so your children will see what healthy decisions look like. If you don't know how to get him to go, call social services or a women's shelter. Do you have any other reIatives or friend who can take you it for a while? I don't make any of these suggestions lightly -- doing it will feel really hard and against everything that you've been doing. But what you've been doing hasn't worked. Don't keep making the same mistake over and over thinking there will be a different outcome. The mistake is allowing him to drink himself and your family into chaos and financial and emotional ruin. It doesn't mean you don't love him. It means you have wisdom and care about protecting yourself and your kids. Peace and strength to you!
Can you get him to a doctor who can diagnose him? I agree you should go to AL ANON meetings
I fully understand that it is up to the individual to want to change and I imagine he doesn't care enough to but maybe you can make certain steps to alleviate the desperate choices he is making.
There r nurses on this forum and I think a person gets to the point no matter how much oxygen they get, their body can no longer absorb it. They actually have carbon dioxide in their system which is suffocating them. If he won't see a doctor then I guess u will just have to wait till he passes out and call an ambulance. Ur husband is killing himself and you may want to look ahead.