My grandpa is 80 years old. I believe he is showing some signs of sundowning or something. He won’t answer us, we can stand right in front of him and speak to him but it’s like he just stares right through us. Sometimes we’ll ask him a question and he’ll look at us and say “what?” Then go right back to staring through us or away from us. I’ve also noticed that when using the bathroom, he seems to try to walk away without pulling his diaper and pants up which has led to us being there constantly to be sure he does. Towards dinner time it is much worse. He also becomes angry around dinner and even asking a question causes him to raise his voice and get angry when he finally will answer you. Whenever I bring this up to his neuro doctor they seem to think that if he can tell them his birthday, the year and who the current president is then all is good and well in their eyes. Any advice on any of this?
sounds like the beginning of dementia. in the beginning, no doctor will diagnose dementia, even though the family sees many signs. this is also to protect the person (once a doctor starts officially diagnosing dementia, there can be consequences; so during the early stage of dementia, no doctor will diagnose dementia).
check your grandfather's hearing. he might have hearing loss as well.
the two very often go together!
bad hearing = you might start getting dementia (not always) (might)
hearing aids help slow down dementia. hearing sounds (even cars, birds, footsteps...), hearing conversations, stimulate the brain.
A geriatrician (usually an internist with additional training and certification in geriatircs -- conditions and care for aging patients that may have a range of conditions) will need to first rule out medical issues. Does you LO have a UTI, is there a Rx med interaction causing issues, is there deficienty or other problem with the basic "chems", etc. Once such "medical" issues are ruled out OR resolved; then the cognitive studies (the work up) should be done.
My mom went through this. Those cognitive studies were done over two days, with each session over an hour. They studies were done by the neuropsychologist (has a PhD) who partnered with a neuropsychiatrist (is a physician, has an MD).
The psychologist was largely focused on what if any thinking, memory, or thinking/memory processing, ALD/IADA and motor processing issues were present. Lots of folks are not aware that various "motor processing" issues can be one of the first tell tail signs of dementia (such as having trouble or gait issues if one is trying to walk in a large rectangle pattern while also answering questions.) The brain starting to be damaged by dementia apparently may not be able to adequately process both skills at the same time. The person may NOT be able to walk well/steady within the designated pattern AND ALSO at the same time respond fluidly to the questions being asked.
The psychiatrist went through assessing what if any underlying mental disorders (depression as an example) might be part of the problem in order to rule out or diagnose any such mental health concerns NOT necessarily the cause of the other, potentially larger pattern of cognitive decline.
And the geriatric physician will also interview close family, to gather what close family may be seeing at home. Dementia patients can "rally" and appear better when they know they are being assessed. So the family input -- when mom or dad -- is just being observed by those closest are important as part of the overall assessment. What changes in behavior (such as those you have enumerated) are important to report. What tasks or skills could you LO do at one time, but now is having difficulty starting, doing or completing.
For my mom, this later issue was for me the conclusive marker (NOT that I am a clinician). Mom wanted to make a cheese cake for a holiday dinner. She has a specific recipe she has used for 50+ years; making this cheese cake multiple times through each year. That last time, however, she just stared at the recipe (I had gathered all the ingredients and put them on the counter. She was not steady and having trouble just standing at the counter. After watching this for a long while, I asked if there was a problem. She said she wanted to use less sugar than what was listed (1/3 cup of sugar). So I said sure, use less if you want. She said, "I will add 1/2 cup, then). I thought WTF? I said mom, 1/2 cup is more than 1/3; she responded "What do you mean, the number 2 is less than the number 3." I just said, let me help you. She sat down and I made the cake.
She, no longer was able follow the recipe, nor able to process measurements. She had not really be cooking for while, eating things out of boxes. She just forgot how to cook: but she knew the date, her name and the President's name.
At 63 I definitely am having problems now. I even forgot where I worked one morning. But no md will respond. I think we miss the opportunity to curtail this disease when we ignore it until it's in the advanced stages. Got myself a Neuro psych eval 3 yrs ago. My memory is avg. Thing is, my memory has never been avg. Always superior, even though I have chronic fatigue syndrome. I don't think I will fall apart any time soon but in bits and pieces slowly. I do not want my senior years to play out like my mom's.
I love how these doctors who spend 15 minutes with someone think they know your loved one better than you do. 🙄
I recognized the dinner time issue as tantrums began to erupt over little or nothing. I bought a TV tray and put my husband there to dine by himself and watch TV..............we now have peaceful dinners, just not together. It's a win-win situation and I'm quite pleased. We will give it a try just for Thanksgiving, but the togetherness will end abruptly if a tantrum erupts: Pumpkin Pie tastes good no matter where you eat it.
See All Answers