I don't know how to put it, but honest to God, there is a tone of voice my father uses when he "asks" (aka "tells") me to do something that is like nails on a chalkboard.
I think it's partly because when he worked he was a manager of a large department in a big company and he was used to "asking" people to do things in a way that made it clear it was an order, and now he's treating me like an employee. But ugh!
For example, we bought him a nice one cup coffee maker for his assisted living room and he broke it. (He breaks a lot of stuff). The way he told me: "That coffee maker your husband got me? It crapped out after like ten cups of coffee! I need a new one."
Or, even before he says hello! "I need you to go to Target and get me some things."
I really feel like I would be less frustrated if he asked more nicely. I mean, I have a teenager at home and she asks for things more politely! It seems petty, but it's very draining to be spoken to like this. But when I tell him how frustrating it is, he gets mad and says "fine, I won't ask you for anything ever again." (I wish!)