After reading so many comments about the hardship on children who cares for a parent with dementia or Alzheimer's, how do I convince both my children that I'm right in my thinking about putting me in a nursing facility that aides in this awful disease, and leave me alone, don't visit, remember me the way I was, not what this disease does to family. I won't know them anyways! I don't want my kids to go through what my Aunt and Uncle and my Dad went through with my grandmother. I tried to help too, but my part was little compare to theirs. I'm 64 years old, and I pray this disease doesn't happen to me or anything else that may put my children out. I can't convince my children through. I wish they could read some of the caregivers comments. It breaks my heart to read them, as I'm sure those caregivers are hating the way their feeling. (and they shouldn't).
I love my kids, I wanted 5 but God blessed me with 2 awesome kids, whom I adore. I tell my kids to please go by my wishes, and don't worry what other's think or say. I've learned in this life, some people will judge and talk about you no matter what, they have to bring someone down to make them feel good. I have a friend who said to me "I expect my kids to take care of me when I no longer can"! "After everything I've done for them, it's the least they can do"! I told her she needs to do some rethinking...lol
You see, I chose to have kids, to love, nurture, and set them free to a accomplishment all they can! Not to take care of me!!! You see what I'm saying? It was my choice, I didn't have kids so they would have to change my diapers, feed me, wash me! Don't get me wrong, my children are very loving and caring people, and I'm very blessed. I just want them to live and remember me as me. I'm not saying put me in an awful place, (I know my kids wouldn't anyways..lol) But to not get caught up in my care that they lose the joy of living!! That would break my heart. I threaten them that if they don't abide by my wishes, I'll come back and haunt them ....they just laugh and say, sure mom .. They think I'm nuts! Is there something legal I can do? I have my DNR set, my funeral in the process of payments, my life insurance copies to each kid, I just want to be sure this wish of mine is carried out, if it needs to. My children are not on board with my thinking. Thank you