I can't tell much what this topic is about, but, here goes. I feel as though my husband is aging in place. By that I mean, he has gone through surgery, through rehab, and now he is home. He used to be a master electrician and he knew what this surgery might do. He might not wake up, or be a different person. Anyway, he is confused right now, not about everything like it started out being. But, he knows (I feel) that he ought to know things like turning this way to go to somewhere, or he is just not used to being taken care of when he was the one taking care of me and meeting others needs. Being on the recieving end can be an awkward and not so welcome place. Knowing that you are not able to do some things, and realizing you are aging in place can be a difficult thing.
I have been reading some of your posts and know that you are feeling alone. Most caregivers need others with whom to share their feelings. Somehow knowing that people are in a similar situation makes it easier to deal with. Have you considered going to a support group? I think this could help you quite a bit. Most states have programs to assist with respite care as well. Perhaps a little time off from caregiving would help.
The Rosalynn Carter Institute for Caregiving also talks about creating care nets. This is where you bring together a group of people who help one another and provide care and respite. Perhaps through friends, relatives and neighbors, you could create this too.