I'm so grateful for the courage to call it quits.

Dear Katalina,

I'm glad you are doing the right thing for yourself. And you recognized it was time to make a change. I wish I had done the same before the anger and resentment had poisoned my judgement and compassion. It will take time to adapt, but I know you can do it. (((hugs)))

Happy for you, kata! I'm lying here in real time on the sofa I bought for my dad's new Senior Apartment. I know I've secured his future. Now how much more do I want to put myself through??? And why is it so very guilty and lonely feeling? I was brought up to believe that family is a tribe -- and one does not abandon your tribe. But I'm worn out at present. I want to hand off care to others and take a step back and remember who I am without this caregiving as part of daily life. I don't know if it works like that.

I hope you have found your peace with "all of it." I wish you a bright, happy, peaceful future.

It takes courage to call it quits! I called it two years ago now. Regaining my life, and really reinventing it has been a challenge. My caregiving was also abusive, but not by the folks, by twisted sisters that I will never know or understand their behavior over that four years.

So be patient and kind to yourself Katalina. It will happen. I first needed about seven months to even begin to feel like myself. It is still a work in progress. Best wishes to you.

You do deserve the chance at happiness! I know it is MUCH easier to say "don't feel guilty" than it is to put that into practice, especially if guilt is a long-time companion. At least try to push it to the very back of your mind, and don't let it make any decisions!