After a week with my elder parents, we realized they no longer can take care of themselves. What is the next step?
My mother, 70, has been suffering from Rheumatoid Arthritis everywhere in her body for the past 5 years. We recently went on a trip and finally she agreed on letting us use a wheelchair to help for the week. During the week, we gained a lot of new information. She can no use the restroom by herself, is not brushing her teeth or bathing regularly, and rarely drinks water. My father, 80, is a heart patient and it's tough on him to lift her and take care of himself at the same time. Both are saying they're fine. Though I would love for them to stay in their home as long as possible, I don't think they are taking care of themselves. Mom has lost all interest in life and my dad is starting to just get exhausted. We are all drained of listening to her complain yet not wanting any help. It seems like it's always us just getting through the day instead of having a long-term plan, but no one will talk about it. If we do, she starts crying. I feel guilty feeling annoyed instead of loving the time I have with her, but the time is no longer consisting of making memories- unless listening to the new aches and pains is a memory. Any advice on what to do next would be appreciated.