It's now out of my hands.

Started by

If you've read any of my long posts, it's my uncle in Las Vegas, I'm in Sacramento that has brought me to this forum.

My uncle has refused home health, blood work, MRI, Neuropsychologist. He won't take his meds, hadn't bathed the whole week I was there.

His Neurologist contacted DMV about his driving, so it's been revoked, yet he still drives. I've witnessed him drinking/driving (I tried to take the alcohol from him but he wouldn't let me have the drink or the keys)

So his primary called me today to say the Neurologist had contacted her and they are both concerned. At this point his primary called my uncle to set up an appointment to see her, he refused (he really likes his primary Dr) so she called to tell me she's calling in APS.

She will ask them to contact me when they have a "plan" for my uncle.

I'm exhausted with trying to get him to do the things his Dr's are asking him, I'm afraid for him and everyone else on the road when he drives.

I'm so scared for him and yet I'm glad. It's time to let someone else take over and do the things I can't do for him. I'm prepared to go the "legal" route if need be.



As painful as this must be, Sqbear50, it may really be a turn for the best. Uncle is a danger to himself and others. He needs intervention and supervision. I hope APS will come up with a reasonable plan for him.
Thank you for reassuring me that this is for my uncle's and others safety.

Even when we know that things need to be done, we still feel guilty doing them. It's usually that way in families, like we're supposed to cover for each other. What you did was the right thing. It would be so much harder if you learned that he caused an accident that caused someone else hardship or injury. He might not appreciate it, but I know the other people around him do. It is hard for people to give up the independence of driving, but he is an accident just waiting to happen. I hope the state will either tow away the car or let someone else in the family take possession of it. He'll also need someone to watch his money to make sure he doesn't go out and buy another. See if you can arrange transportation for him to go the places he needs. You did a good job, Nicole.
Your update sounds very promising. Good for you both, as it seems to offer protection for your uncle and the public. Thank Goodness the doctors stepped up and took action. I hope things continue in the right direction.
Couldn't someone take the car away? Out of site, out of mind.

Keep the conversation going (or start a new one)

Please enter your Comment

Ask a Question

Reach thousands of elder care experts and family caregivers
Get answers in 10 minutes or less
Receive personalized caregiving advice and support