IT SEEMS LIKE EVERYTIME MY HUSBAND GOES ON A HUNT FOR AN ITEM ITS ONE HE HAS HIDDEN AND FORGOT, WHY??? IT IS THE CRAZIEST THING BECAUSE HE ONLY LOOKS FOR WHAT HE HIDES BUT DOESNT KNOW HE HID IT AT ALL BUT SOMETHING TELLS HIM TO LOOK FOR IT????
My mom hid things to keep them safe - if she stuck to her normal hiding places it wasn't a problem but when she started hiding from me e.g, when I took her car keys away then it was a nightmare as she would take all the keys and hide them and since the deadbolt locks require a key this was a real problem
Those were very challenging times and I had little patience for it after a long day at work I'd ask her where the keys were and she'd reply, that's what I want to know - oftentimes they were in her bra or her pillowcase or the flowerpot - how we lasted as long as we did without a major crisis
After living with my mother a few years I've learned not to even ask why. Logic and reasoning is often the first thing that leaves. I have noticed there are patterns in where they put things. That saves a lot of time when it comes to hunting for them. My mother has 3 or 4 places she usually puts things. She isn't really hiding them. She just puts them there. If something that is missing isn't in one of these places I just consider it good and lost. I figure they will turn up one day. :)
I agree with Jeanne, as someone who is watching their Mom deteriorate. Her paranoia, obsession, hiding of prized possessions has only gotten worse. She hides her things and literally a minute later asks me where it is. Arguing only seems to make the confusion worse, or leads down a path of twisted logic.
Life gets pretty confusing when you have brain damage. Many people with dementia go through periods of paranoia. Their daughter tell them things happened that they don't remember. A neighbor says something that doesn't make sense. It is hard to know what they can trust. So they hide possessions to keep them safe from untrustworthy people. And then they forget they even hid them, let alone where. And this seems to confirm their suspicions -- see, someone is stealing from me!
Dang. This can get to be a viscous cycle. It is good to know that in many cases this paranoia does not last forever.
Try not to argue with him over these "lost" items. Help him search for missing items. Be sympathetic and comforting, without agreeing that things are stolen.
Those were very challenging times and I had little patience for it after a long day at work
I'd ask her where the keys were and she'd reply, that's what I want to know - oftentimes they were in her bra or her pillowcase or the flowerpot - how we lasted as long as we did without a major crisis
Dang. This can get to be a viscous cycle. It is good to know that in many cases this paranoia does not last forever.
Try not to argue with him over these "lost" items. Help him search for missing items. Be sympathetic and comforting, without agreeing that things are stolen.