Which websites did you use to find the right facility for your loved one?

And be aware that the cost they quote may include only room and board, and none of the "assistance" your parent may need now or in the future. In some places, there's an additional monthly fee for things like medications management. They may not tell you about these costs unless you ask, but I found that they could add several hundred dollars to the monthly cost of the facility, and they were likely to increase over time at an unpredictable rate.

When I was looking I found that A Place for Mom didn't list all of the five facilities available in my area. I got better results by googling "assisted living" and the name of our town. Then I called each place and asked them to mail me brochures, including --- if they had them --- floor plans of the units, prices, cost of add-on services, etc. I checked them out on line. Then I visited them. All of this took only a couple of days once I had received and reviewed the material they sent me. (That helped me narrow down the questions I wanted to ask each one.)

Keep in mind that the websites for facilities make them all look like a five star hotel. They show the lobbies with fancy furniture, beautiful floral arrangements and spotless, shiny floors. Maybe even a fireplace. The rooms are photographed from an angle that make them look huge. My mom was in a great facility, but it took me a year to figure out where the photograph on the brochure was taken.

Your best bet is to find a few close by. Look up their state rating on the Internet. Then visit them personally. Mornings are a good time. They will discuss pricing with you where rates are never mentioned in the websites.

When you tour, Trust your five senses. My mom’s facility never smelled like urine. Ever. And trust your gut.

I just Googled facilities. My mom didn’t like the places that had the overstuffed furniture fancy places. The last place I saw really reminded me of a college dorm, nothing fancy about it, and she loves it.

There are local placement agencies that will help you alot more then a place for mom.

I would recommend not using them. I had the worst experience of my life and I was actually guilted by them that I wouldn't give up my retirement money so my dad could be placed in a facility that he couldn't afford. What?!? Like this isn't the hardest thing ever, I am made to feel like a piece of crap because I won't sacrifice myself so they get a bigger commission. Sick.

Ask any rehab facility for referrals, use at least 2 different ones and don't tell them the top dollar available, that is right where they go.

Some of these agencies get 50% of 1st month, others get up to 100% so you can see why they want to put you into a place that costs 3500 vs. 1500.

Also, ask the facility if they would be willing to accept less, I got 100 bucks a month off my dads AL.

Best of luck finding the right fit, it is difficult enough to deal with under the best circumstances.

Hugs to you!