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My mom lives with me and has for the last 4 years. What was supposed to be a 2 week visit with my sister in Florida turned out to be a 2 month hospital and rehab stay. She was admitted for severe dehydration and UTI (creatinine levels 5.7) She developed c diff while in rehab and after 3 days of no diarrhea they released her to my sister. Mom was still having issues but just wanted to come home. She flew back to our home on Sunday and by Wednesday she was admitted to hospital, she has c diff again, dehydration again and another UTI.


I don’t know what to do with her once they release her. My daughter is pregnant with our first grandchild, my son is engaged I have a lot of activities happening and I don’t want to miss out on them. I have missed out on so much over the last 4 years because I’ve chose to stay and take care of her while everyone else goes and does stuff. My mom has a lot of health issues. In the 4 years she has lived with me she has had 2 strokes, heart attack, pneumonia, multiple UTI’s and dehydration that have required hospital stays. It’s hard to get her to eat or drink anything. It’s like I’m asking her to drink poison.


She and my step dad did not plan on this stage of their lives financially. So, if I put her in a home she could only pay for 5 months and then we would have to apply for Medicaid. I’m exhausted from it all and probably rambling on and on. Her health will continue to decline, and I just don’t know that I can care for her in our home, yet feel like I should....after all she is my mom.

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This was posted over 3 months ago so hopefully OPs mom got the care she needs.
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Reply to worriedinCali
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I think that your mom has care needs that require professional care. Sadly that happens.

I would get her doctor to write a prescription for 2x daily probiotics. The antibiotics kill every germ indiscriminately and that is why she has c-diff. Probiotics will introduce healthy bacteria and help her feel better and start mending her system.

I can't believe how ignorant the medical field is, proven to be highly beneficial and yet they continue to destroy people's guts.

Make sure that she is getting the probiotics 2 hours either side of any antibiotics. This will ensure that both can do their jobs.

I would also get some good yogurt and encourage her to eat as much as possible. I just got a maple yogurt, oh my, I could live on that tasty stuff. I recommend grass fed organic yogurt, more benefits.

Find a place for her now and go back to being her daughter and advocate.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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Listen to CountryMouse. Please!!!!

Your mother is getting substandard care at home. No fault of yours or your sister. It's simply not possible for her to get professional care at home no matter how much you "care".

Please don't endanger your grandbaby by exposing her/him to C-Diff. Please get your mother situated in a care home with competent RNs and LPNs who can give your mother the medical care she needs and deserves.
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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The best way to take stool transplants for c diff is via ng tube. Other methods take time and are not that reliable...try to find a family member young for the stool transplants. yea; leave her in the home; after all she's only your mom.
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Reply to shar1953
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As an old retired RN I can tell you that C-Diff KILLS> Please see a specialist in your area who can point you to a doctor that that does fecal transplant. Yeah, I know. They give your Mom capsules with the poop of someone else. It often works overnight. She will not want to eat while she knows it can give her explosive uncontrollable diarrhea. As I said, I saw many die from this, those with immune compromise, who had been on antibiotics, who had HIV, who had chemotherapy. I have known people so desperate that with the help of enema tubing, a blender, and youtube posts did their OWN fecal transplants. The capsules are better as they get the entire digestive system. Please seek good help. This is no joke.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Your mother needs professional care and you can’t provide that in your home. Sometimes the most loving and caring thing to do is finding care in a setting that can provide for needs you can’t meet. I wish you the best in the search
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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You are a lady with children - soon grandbaby too! keinehora - a husband and a life, and providing full time care for your mother doesn't really fit.

I wanted to point that out first, because you do have to consider ALL of the people who are important to you, and not just only one of them; and because I would like you to make more reasonable demands of yourself.

But turning to your mother...

" In the 4 years she has lived with me she has had 2 strokes, heart attack, pneumonia, multiple UTI’s and dehydration that have required hospital stays. It’s hard to get her to eat or drink anything."

So that's gone well, then?

It would be better for *your mother* to have professional care from trained people she can't resist and argue with and make life impossible for. When she refuses to eat or drink, you feel anxious, guilty and upset. When she tries that in a home, they will encourage her - sometimes quite persuasively - but it won't be an emotional battle. This is only one example of why, because it's just easier, their care will be superior to anything you can provide.

She is your mom, and you do care. Neither of those things will change just because she isn't living in your home.
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Reply to Countrymouse
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