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Hi guys, Thanks to everyone who have asked and answered questions, you have helped me so much. I retired over 1 yr. ago early from out of state to move w/ my parents in Florida, they're both diagnosed w/ dementia in their 80's.


In 2017 we did POA and Lady Bird Deed. I'm hoping that's sufficient because that's all they could afford. I'm only child for them and I have 1 son on disability who moved w/ me to help. Thank God for that because I wouldn't be able to take care of both. They're impossible a lot of the times. I'm stressed out most times, suffer from anxiety and depression and just trying to do my best. My mom been on hospice almost 6 months now and their Dr. just recommend my Dad yesterday. There's Aggression, threats, trying to fight us, Trying to leave to go home, wherever that is almost everyday, every and all the symptoms of, they go through and go through.


My parents left their good jobs in NY over 30 yrs. ago and moved to FL and ended up with very little pension and SS. My Dad worked odd jobs into his early 80's. He's 87 now, so the last 5 yrs I've been helping out financially paying their car note, cable, etc. It's wasn't easy for me but I was glad I could help. Almost 2 yrs. now my Dad got an inheritance from an old friend. They went through about a few thousand before I moved down and can't find most of it in house. This is the only thing they have and the house needs alot, I've had to get new appliances and still need more but I wait until it's on its last leg. Because of this money in their account now they won't be eligible for Medicare or Medicaid. I'm not good with this stuff. I can't afford a Lawyer for this and I have to look out for myself because I left my job early, I'm in my 50's. I did over 33yrs on my job and was eligible for early retirement without penalty but your still young enough to keep working and get a better pension. I was so anxious and eager to come and take care of them but it's been much harder than I imagined even thou many warned me. I still wouldn't change it. I just need to know all the right things to do pertaining to their finances, prep for their last days and I don't want to be left to pay their bills after. I'm on a few of my Dad's big store cards, is that a good decision? My brain is so cluttered with taking care of them and myself, I've not had a break since I started but I make sure my son gets his every other weekend he goes away and my stress level goes up. I feel guilty if I leave for too long, I don't want to stress my son out. What other paperwork do I need if any? Thank you again for all your helpful comments. So glad I have this forum. I'm sure I didn't ask everything.

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Thank you JoAnn29, will look into POA wording.
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Reply to Cocolay8
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I think you should not have your name on any of their credit cards, as I think this would make you responsible. Don't co-sign any loans. Make sure all transactions are documented fully. Are they paying you to care or them? This needs documentation according to what your state requires. FYI if they have investments they are very caution about talking to DPOAs (TDAmeriTrade made us go through a whole rigamarole to get my POA in place with them.) Also if you sign any documents for them there is a certain way to sign (like your name "acting as PoA") or some such. Make sure you know the rules for your particular state.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Cocolay8 Feb 6, 2020
I don't get paid to take care of them, and I'm going to really look into the credit cards(2). Thank you for the suggestion, i appreciate it.
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Sorry. Forget to answer. No. you are not responsible for parents bills. If u inherit, then debts will have to be paid first before u get anything.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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You have POA. Go to the bank and ask them to print out what accounts they have with the bank. I was able to get totals for checking and CDs.

Get the ability to get on their acct and print out their bank statements. Hopefully the inheritance was direct deposited. Ours was.

If you have a drs. letter saying ur parents can no longer make informed decisions ur POA would take effect if it reads "when no longer competent". If "immediate" when signed, you now have authority. With this authority, you can place ur parents in an AL if they can afford it. At this time I wouldn't worry about Mom but when she passes maybe place Dad. If money is a problem, check with ur State Medicaid to see what they will cover.
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