Right when I think I've made good progress with acceptance, coping, etc something ELSE comes along and I don't know how to deal and just want to scream.
Since late 2014 my mom has been taking opiate pain meds. It started out legit with a major shoulder surgery, but after that healed other pain ailments started popping up, mostly back pain. I didn't see her as often then and she always downplayed her use. As the years went by I noticed she always had a script.
Eventually an MRI of her entire back was done & it showed nothing to warrant chronic pain let alone pain that required daily opiates. So that doctor stopped prescribing and referred her to a pain management place.
I know she got pills from them but also injections that "never worked" & the scripts continued. Still the whole time she minimized her use saying she only took them "once in a while" when she was "really in pain".
Then she moved here.
Found a PC right away & he would not prescribe opiates & told her she would have to go to pain management. So she went to a "wellness" clinic of some sort, basically where people go to get pain pills. She had to sign a "pain contract" that she could only get pain meds from them.
By this time I'm paying closer attention & even mentioned it on this board before. Again, she played the game & got pills and injections but the injections never worked. She would never let me go to those pain appointments & keeps me totally out of it. So I started to count her pills. I was able to determine she was taking between 1-3 a day, depending on her supply. This whole time she lied to me when I would casually ask if she had needed any pain meds lately... "Oh no, only every once in a while". Meanwhile I'm counting the pills and know that's a lie.
Talked to my sister & husband about it. Mostly my husband because my sister is out of state & likes to keep this situation at arms length & always has. We decided not to confront her because the use didn't seem excessive. My impression was that she used the pills to kind of regulate her mood. I was also afraid that if I confronted her & told her I counted her pills she would hide them & make sure I couldn't do it again as her defensiveness around me has gotten worse with time.
When she left for PA she left with 150 pills. My guess is she told the pain doctor she would need them for several months, but what happened is when she got to PA she got a pain doctor there too.
Anyway- I have no idea when she had her last opiate but by her second day here she was complaining of tooth pain & made an appointment for the dentist. Turns out all she needed was a cleaning. No other issues. No reason for "pain". Then some vague complaints of abdominal pain started, but nothing too bad. She then went to an Urgent Care center, without telling me & only told me when she got back last Friday that she went "because my side has been hurting". She got checked out but they did not give her any opiates. Just said it was likely muscular. That Friday she made an appointment with the pain doctor for the following Monday (yesterday).
Sunday we always watch football, so I invited her over to eat & watch the games. She came over but left after about an hour. She ate & seemed okay. Next thing I know she calls me and wants me to take her to the ER for her pain. I was afraid not to so I had to call Uber to take us since I had drank 3 beers.
LONG eve & she got admitted. End result, all scans & tests were negative. NOTHING wrong, but she got some opiate doses. She canceled the pain doc b/c she didn't think she would be released but she was by 11:00 the next day, with NO opiates. Her nurse told me she had "concerns" about the opiates.
We're home less than an hour and I see she is gone and track her. She's at the pain doctor even tho her discharge instructions were to take Tylenol. Later she lied and told me she hadn't gone anywhere.
I'm at a loss as to what to do about this.