Very uncomfortable for me and mother. I'm a 66-year-old male. I changed my mothers poopy/runny diaper.

Why would you be "wrong" for not wanting to change your mother's briefs with stool in them? I'm quite certain that I couldn't do it bc I have a weak stomach and a bad gag reflex. I'd wind up having to clean up my OWN mess in addition to hers!

Don't look for reasons to be The Bad Son, ok? Hire more in home caregivers or think about placement now for mother. That doesn't make you a Bad Son either. We all have our limitations and we SHOULD!

If you're not wanting to ever have to change her diaper again, then you best either hire more caregivers for your mother(with her money of course)or have her placed in the appropriate facility where there will be 24/7 care and her diaper will get changed any time she needs it.
I would NEVER want my son to have to change my diaper if and when the day comes, and I've made it perfectly clear to both my son and daughter that when that day comes I want to be placed in some type of facility where my care will be on the facility and not on my children.

My husband has been talking to a male coworker about our situation with caring for my mom in her home, because this person just went through a parallel situation. The coworker and his brother took care of their mom at home as long as they could, until she started needing depends. This was very uncomfortable for all parties and mom soon moved to a skilled nursing facility. There is no right or wrong. They just surpassed their comfort level and had to make a change. A lot of relief came with this decision.

My friend, I'm sure your mother didn't relish changing your "poopy/runny" diapers in the days prior to your life as a member of the potty-trained community.

The fact that at the age of 66 you still use the term "poopy" is petty ridiculous.
No, you should not be changing your mother's diapers, but unless she has 24 hour caregivers or is in a nursing home you may have to. That's part of the price family has to pay when they keep an incontinent, diaper-dependent elder at home.

I was an in-home caregiver for 25 years. I have wiped more ancient can and could probably make a mountain to rival Everest with the countless adult diapers and pull-ups I've changed over the years.
It never gets less nasty no matter how many you've changed.

No you aren't wrong, but I will tell you frankly that in most cases daughters feel the same about changing their mothers. And mother's feel the same about daughters. And husbands feel the same about changing diapers for wives and wives are as distraught as your mother was about you. Sp you and your mother are not alone in your grief.

No, you are not wrong. What you are attempting to do is hurting both of you. Start looking for a good facility where mom gets 24/7 care by professionals. It's time. Then you can go back to being her helpful supportive adult child and friend.

Nope. You're not wrong. I am female and had to change my aunt's depends. She dropped a load right in front of me. I had never done this for my mother or father. I don't want to do it again.
Can you get a caregiver to assist?

No. It can be in uncomfortable and is not for everyone.

Nope, you are not wrong to feel that way. I am a female, and I had to clean up and change my MIL a few times. The first time I did it, I was pretty sure that I suffered a bit of PTSD. It was something that happened suddenly, and I was glad to be able to stomach it and help my hubby and BIL (no sisters and BIL is not married). But....I don't ever want to do it again. So, I can only imagine how uncomfortable you felt as a male doing that for your mom. God bless you as you get her personal care figured out moving forward.

I’m a daughter..in 60s ..my mother now 96…If you are unable/unwilling to do this part of the job…& it does get to be a job…then you need 24/7 home caregivers or have her placed in facility. It’s no easier for daughters to do it either. The one thing you have to keep in mind…home caregivers don’t always show up..you have to cover for them. ..no matter if you have “plans “ to do other things or not. One time..I gave my mother senekot because she didn’t go in a few days…& it came out super messy & went out of diaper & up her nitegown…well, I wasn’t gonna take that over her hair & head…so I took sizzors & cut her nitegown & threw away…then changed everything…bed sheets, gave her bed bath…& bought her new nitegown to replace one I had to get rid of..so yes, it does indeed get messy & nauseous 🤮.
Hugs 🤗