Your mother has been spending money that the family can't afford, yes?
You have challenged her. She has reacted badly. There are new health issues for one or more members of the family which make it imperative that the budget is kept under control; and yet at the same time your mother is emotionally unprepared to accept the need for changes.
You live with your father and your mother? You have done all your life?
You are looking for allies with the skills and authority to gain your mother's agreement to a different plan. Who those allies might be depends partly on who you're already in touch with.
So: who is there? Health or social care professionals? Elder care or estate planning lawyers or specialists?
What I'm hoping is that this rough sketch will at least get you started - if only because you'll be able to correct anything I've misunderstood!
Don't give up, please come back and tell us more, and meanwhile I hope the immediate situation calmed down for you.
Ruthie, I am very sorry for the chaos you are dealing with, based on your profile. Your cry for help indicates the severity of the situation. The people on this site are from all over the world and can offer a lot of wisdom but what you need is more immediate intervention. Is there a doctor, social worker or case manager you can reach out to? I understand that’s unlikely since it is a weekend. If there is an immediate danger, please call 911. But at the very least, contact Arizona APS at (877) 767-2385. Good luck to you and your family and please come back and let us know how you’re doing.
Ruthie, I couldn't make sense of your post here or your profile info. We are not an agency, we only private individuals giving advice and suggestions and opinions to caregivers about caregiving. Sounds like you live in chaos but don't want to "separate family of 3 not an option", we don't know who the 3 are (adults? children? elderly?) please repost something that gives clear info and asks an actual question. Also, please repost in the questions section, not discussion section. Peace to you, you seem to really need it. (((hug)))
You have challenged her. She has reacted badly. There are new health issues for one or more members of the family which make it imperative that the budget is kept under control; and yet at the same time your mother is emotionally unprepared to accept the need for changes.
You live with your father and your mother? You have done all your life?
You are looking for allies with the skills and authority to gain your mother's agreement to a different plan. Who those allies might be depends partly on who you're already in touch with.
So: who is there? Health or social care professionals? Elder care or estate planning lawyers or specialists?
What I'm hoping is that this rough sketch will at least get you started - if only because you'll be able to correct anything I've misunderstood!
Don't give up, please come back and tell us more, and meanwhile I hope the immediate situation calmed down for you.
I am very sorry for the chaos you are dealing with, based on your profile. Your cry for help indicates the severity of the situation. The people on this site are from all over the world and can offer a lot of wisdom but what you need is more immediate intervention. Is there a doctor, social worker or case manager you can reach out to? I understand that’s unlikely since it is a weekend. If there is an immediate danger, please call 911. But at the very least, contact Arizona APS at (877) 767-2385. Good luck to you and your family and please come back and let us know how you’re doing.