I have not posted since last Sept but have been reading. The time has come to decide what to do with husband. He has been in 4 hospitals and 3 rehabs since January 2014. Diagnosed finally with vascular and Lewy Body dementia. He now cannot stand at all, knows me and family but has no clue about most of our life, is still verbally abusive (was before he got sick) and I am now getting sick myself mentally and physically, headaches, body aches, etc. Stress. I am sole caregiver with not much $$$. I had to stop working since 2009 to care for my dad and now hubby. Not sure I can care for him at home even with home health care that can come in few times a week for a few hours. He is currently in a halfway decent rehab/nursing home and they have been trying to talk me into having him live there. That tears me apart with guilt. I figured they just want the business so I consulted his neuro and primary care Dr and they agree. I have meeting with elder care lawyer in a few days. I do NOT have POA or any kind of guardianship over hubby yet. Speaking on phone with the elder care firm, their solution is to get conservatorship (sp?) which is very costly, use the money from an annuity hubby has in his name only, pay off our home which would qualify him for Medicaid and would leave me the home, a car and I think they said $1800 per month in cash. Has anyone done this? He has 2 adult daughters that are beneficiaries of this annuity and they would not have to fight me on this or the cost goes up to what nobody can afford. I do not think they know they are beneficiaries (it is not a ton of money by the way) and I can go on and on but guess I will see what I get out of my appt. with lawyer. I guess my question is should I do t his or try again to care for him at home and see if I can??? Thanks to all for reading.