Elderly mom has been so negative and depressed. All she ever talks about are the people she has lost. She is very controlling and demanding of our time and our money like it is her own. It is getting to the point where we don’t even want to be around her. When told no she escalates the situation and becomes very agitated. She refuses to see her doctor and discuss her emotional issues.

I’d contact her doctor and let him/her know what you’re seeing. The doctor can’t discuss it with you but you can tell, either by letter or in person, and make an appointment for your mom. Tell her whatever reason she needs to go, an annual physical, an insurance requirement, anything but to discuss her emotional issues. She likely needs medicine to help things. There’s no cure for dementia, it will only worsen, but stroke can bring on depression and there are meds to help with that. As for your time and money, no one, whether or not it’s your mother, has the right to demand either. Your mother shouldn’t know anything about your money, and your time is yours to share as you choose
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to Daughterof1930

Your profile says Mom suffers from a stroke and Dementia. Stroke itself has probably done some damage. People suffering from Dementia can no longer reason or show empathy They get self centered. Nothing you do will make them happy. They have lost that ability to appreciate.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to JoAnn29
karenb0304 Dec 19, 2019
Sorry. I guess I set up my profile incorrectly. I have two moms in my life. One had a stroke and the other seems to be suffering from depression. The depressed/negative one is the one that is going off the deep end as of late. We help her financially and the more bills we pay for her the more she wastes her own money. So discouraged right now.

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