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My mother was in assisted living for 4 years. She fell and broke her pelvis and can no longer walk. Due to mental and physical decline we put her in memory care. I absolutely hate memory care and feel like she is in a prison.


She has short term memory loss and falls because she still thinks she can walk. She is vey high functioning and doesn't need to be in a lock down facility. She refuses to go to a board and care, because she feels like she is in somebodies home. Would she be able to go back to Assisted Living with alarms on wheel chair, bed and 1 hour checks? Any ideas of where she can go? We had a hard time placing her because she is a 2 person assist for toileting.

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So is memory care more help for the patient overall? I’ve wondered about this too.

My mom has Parkinson’s.
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Ahmijoy Apr 8, 2019
Memory Care, as I understand it, is more for the resident with mental issues such as dementia, who like my mom, are a flight risk. My mom was also combative and a fall risk. Staff to resident ratio is smaller and in my mom’s case, her Memory Care staff had special training. The doors are also locked and coded so residents can’t get out.
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Dunn, usually a facility will evaluate a person before accepting that person to live in Memory Care. If the facility thought your Mom wasn't ready for Memory Care they wouldn't have suggested she move to that level.

I remember the day when the facility called me to say it was time for my Dad to move from Independent Living over to Memory Care. That took me totally by surprise. Apparently Dad was able to hold his memory together whenever I visited, and when I wasn't there, he was having memory issues.

I was so relieved when Dad was moved to Memory Care as he was starting to roam at night. With the lock down, I felt it was no different than if he was living at home.... the outside doors would all be locked, too. Dad said it made him feel much safer knowing the doors were locked.

My Mom had the same thing your Mom had regarding thinking she could walk. So I can understand what you are going through in that regard. My Mom was in long-term-care, as she sadly needed a village to take care of her.
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It sounds like Mom would do better in a Skilled Nursing Facility. My mother was a fall risk for the same reason and had dementia. She went right to Skilled Nursing from the hospital and then on to Memory Care, which was at the same facility when she became a flight risk and combative as well.

I don’t believe that Assisted Living would be able to provide the level of care she needs. They would suggest you hire someone privately to care for her. Wherever you do put her, make sure she can stay there. Although she is high-functioning, each change in living arrangements will leave her more and more confused.
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