I was my moms caregiver for the 1st 4 and one half years of her dementia. I have 4 brothers, 2 chose to not participate in her care, one brother would drive 60 miles sometimes once a week to spell me for 18 hours, lastly my youngest brother came by once a week for 45 minutes to visit her. She has spent 3 plus years in an assisted care facility, where I visit when I can, maybe twice a month, because I can't watch her deteriorate more and more each visit. I got news today she has had a bad stroke and may die soon. My question is, why am I expected by my brothers to go see her before she dies, to me I watched her slowly die for 8 plus years, I have good memories that her and I shared while I cared for her, and I would like to remember her from those memories. Does this make me less caring to not want to be there when she passes?