I recently had to move my elderly mother to an assisted living facility. When we moved all of her things in, I asked her where she wanted the phone. She said she didn't think she needed one, and I was relieved.
When she was living alone in her house, she would get "robo calls" or surveys and not understand what the people wanted. In addition, she is extremely hard of hearing and trying to communicate over the phone is nearly impossible, and her short-term memory is highly compromised.
If she feels she needs to, she can make a call from the nurse's desk, as she did today.
She has a doctor's appointment 2 days from now, and called me to ask if we were still going tomorrow morning. I tried to explain where we are in days-of-the week, only to have her say she couldn't understand me. She also asked why we were going (she needs to be established with a doctor closer to her new residence) and I was unable to get her to understand that either.
Yesterday, when I visited, she said, 4 times, "tomorrow is Christmas." Each time I corrected her that the holiday is a week away, but it didn't seem to stick with her.
So I'm sure some may think I've isolated her by her not having a phone, it's a bit of a relief to not get phone calls from her when she doesn't remember what was said and can't hear.
Am I terrible for being relieved that she can't call me for every little thing and that she needs to use the facility phone?