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Long story short, my dad had a series of strokes in May of this year. He moved in with me directly from the hospital. I care for him until the beginning of October. There is a long history of abuse and I took all I could from him. A few weeks ago he moved in with a friend. His memory has declined significantly since his strokes. He has forgotten how he got to my house, why he was in the hospital, been lost inside different stores, etc. A few days ago he decided to go visit a friend in a different town. He arranged for someone to take him and his power chair. While he was in this town, he got lost (this is a town he lived in most of his life) and ended up in a bad neighborhood where he was robbed. The police found him sleeping under a tree in someone's back yard.
At this point I do not feel it is safe for him to live somewhere he can't be supervised continually. I don't know where to start or what to do. I've researched things but it's overwhelming. He doesn't have much of a medical history because up until his strokes he refused pretty much any health care. Where do I start? I can't care for him. My mental or physical health won't allow it.

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I am so sorry you have this stress in your life. It is difficult enough to care for a declining parent, but under circumstances that include an abusive history-that is too much!
First, You are under no legal obligation to house your father. He is not your child. So please do not let anyone make you feel that it is a given that he is with you.
I agree with the idea that it sounds like he needs a guardianship arrangement.
If you are willing to maintain that tie, you can speak to his doctor.
IF he doesn't have access to a primary care physician, you can always take him into the ER, explain he is having mental status changes, and ask for an evaluation.
Hopefully, that will get him admitted and you can go from there trying to get guardianship.
Guardianship allows you to take over the finances and you would determine where he lives.
But that becomes your obligation at that point. You would still not be obligated to have him live with you. But if this is too much please contact one of the agencies.
Is he a veteran? You can access VA help if he is.
Also, go to Eldercare.gov and look into resources in your area.
Be sure to take care of yourself.
Best
Margaret
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The police could have taken him somewhere for observation. Then, when found he could no longer care for himself he could have gone to a NH with Medicaid pending if he has no assets. All u needed to do was refuse to care for him. Now, you need to find a way to have him evaluated. Call ur local Office of Aging and see if they can help u.
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Sounds to me like he needs state guardianship. Would his doctor declare that he can't live alone/unsupervised after that overnight episode? Contact your local Agency for aging. and also social services to get started. Do you have POA? Good luck.. This is a very difficult situation made more complicated by the history of abuse. I don't believe you should be doing hands on caregiving due to that. Keep us posted on how you are doing.
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