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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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I do have to add this...or I should say ask this... Can you honestly care for him SAFELY at home? Is your home safe for him? Can you care for him alone or will you have to hire caregivers to help you? If you can not care for him SAFELY you really should look into having him remain in LTC. This does not mean you have "failed" this means that you have accepted YOUR limitations and are doing the best that you can to keep him safe and card for.
I would never have the hospital keep me alive in the event of a stroke or another condition requiring long-term care. I don't call that living and don't expect Medicaid for assistance. It's on my health directive requesting to pull the plug if not able to recover in one day. I am alone with no one to care for me.
The problem is that most strokes don't kill you; they allow you to live, but very impaired. And while you can decline treatment, you won't die of that. Rather you will go to placement where they will continue to nourish and care for you whether you wish it or not. There is no plug-in cord s/p stroke. When my hubby was in acute stroke condition and in hospital and refused clot buster and embolectomy and telling them "Let me go" I told him "I am willing to let you go, but the truth is you aren't going ANYWHERE but to a nursing home to drool for the next 5 years; this is your only chance". The clot buster worked. My advice is get to the hospital ONLY via ambulance at FIRST SIGN of a stroke; it may be completely reversed, as it was for him. It may not. But it is your only chance to avoid a life lived the hard way.
I was in this position 10 years ago. While my husband was in the nursing home, I started preparing for his eventual return home. I got a hospital bed, diapers, extra blankets, I even moved to a small, ground level apartment. Then, suddenly, the unexpected call came on a Friday evening; he was being kicked out of the nursing home because they couldn't manage his behavior. I tried to find another care home placement for him, but could not find anything that would work. So, I brought him home, quit my job, and learned all about caring for someone post-stroke.
So, my advice is, first, prepare for his physical needs; do you need a special bed?, incontinence products?, wheelchair?, a hoyer lift?, .... spend a lot of time at the nursing home, observing and learning what it takes to take care of him, so you can be better prepared.
Second, the only way you are going to get paid as his caregiver, is if he qualifies for Medicaid. People who have the financial means, hire caregivers and pay directly. If you have exhausted all your assets and resources, and have no more than $2,000 in the bank, then Medicaid will pay for a friend or family member to provide care under the HCBS program (Home and Community Based Services). Find out by first applying for Medicaid. Ask the Medicaid application worker about being his caregiver. It will depend on how disabled he is, what his needs are, and every state has their own requirements. When I started this journey, we lived in Minnesota. Pretty much anyone could be his full time caregiver. That person had to choose a fiduciary representative to manage the budget and payroll. The budget is something that I worked with a case manager to create, and was submitted to the county for approval. My husband needed 24 hour supervision and care. The approved budget included his dietary needs, his incontinence supplies, pay for me (or someone else) as a caregiver, plus pay for respite care. Based on his income, there was a monthly co-pay amount, or spenddown amount, which was, on average, around $1,000 a month. However, I was earning enough as his caregiver, and he received Social Security disability income, so it was worth paying the monthly spenddown. It made up for my income lost when I quit my job. We subsequently moved to Arizona. In Arizona, I have to be employed by a home care agency, and I need first aid/CPR certification, as well as annual continuing education units in order to keep my job. There is no monthly co-pay, but not as many things are covered, so it works out about the same.
Arizona, as in some states, will send a case manager to determine how many hours of care are needed each week. They will add up, in 15 minute increments, how long it takes to provide the needed cares. You may end up with 20 hours or less. In my case, I had to fight for 40 hours a week, because my husband can not be left unsupervised, so I got hours for supervision, and had to say, I refuse to do it for less. Fight for as many hours as you can get. It will cost Medicaid a lot more if he is placed full time in a nursing home for long term care. They are saving money by paying you to do the job.
The point I am trying to make is, every state has their own requirements, and you would do well to find out what the Medicaid HCBS covers in your state, before he comes home. And, have all the physical components ready in your home.
Be prepared for the emotional and physical exhaustion. It is the hardest job you will ever do. And, you will find yourself doing it without the support of your spouse, and you will become isolated from friends, and the outside world in general.
I never wanted to do this. My husband should have died in the hospital, but modern medicine does everything in their power to keep people alive. No one considers the long term cost. My husband in non-mobile, lays in bed or in his recliner, watching TV 24 hours a day. He is resistant to any personal cares, he fights me, grabs my hands, pulls away when I try to clean him, and none of his friends or family want to visit him, because it's not enjoyable for them. It is a very lonely existence, and emotionally draining every day. I wish you the best. Remember that there is no shame in letting him be cared for in a nursing home if or when it becomes too much for you.
I’d read a lot about what the reality is of caring for someone in the home. Even with help, it’s a huge job that may provide no breaks and limited outside support…especially if resources are limited.
The Social Workers in rehab are there to help you. Discuss with them and they can help you define the options better than we strangers from all round the country and at time round the world. Ask to see a Social worker tomorrow, and best of luck.
If your husband is a Veteran the VA will now pay a spouse to be the caregiver for the Veteran. If he is a Veteran and is not in the VA system now is the time to get started on that. Contact your local Veterans Assistance Commission or your States Department of Veterans Affairs and find out what benefits he may be entitled to.
Ask the nursing home discharge planner. Please realize that caring for a stroke survivor is very difficult work. And spouses don’t usually get paid for doing it.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Can you honestly care for him SAFELY at home?
Is your home safe for him?
Can you care for him alone or will you have to hire caregivers to help you?
If you can not care for him SAFELY you really should look into having him remain in LTC.
This does not mean you have "failed" this means that you have accepted YOUR limitations and are doing the best that you can to keep him safe and card for.
When my hubby was in acute stroke condition and in hospital and refused clot buster and embolectomy and telling them "Let me go" I told him "I am willing to let you go, but the truth is you aren't going ANYWHERE but to a nursing home to drool for the next 5 years; this is your only chance".
The clot buster worked.
My advice is get to the hospital ONLY via ambulance at FIRST SIGN of a stroke; it may be completely reversed, as it was for him. It may not. But it is your only chance to avoid a life lived the hard way.
While my husband was in the nursing home, I started preparing for his eventual return home. I got a hospital bed, diapers, extra blankets, I even moved to a small, ground level apartment. Then, suddenly, the unexpected call came on a Friday evening; he was being kicked out of the nursing home because they couldn't manage his behavior. I tried to find another care home placement for him, but could not find anything that would work. So, I brought him home, quit my job, and learned all about caring for someone post-stroke.
So, my advice is, first, prepare for his physical needs; do you need a special bed?, incontinence products?, wheelchair?, a hoyer lift?, .... spend a lot of time at the nursing home, observing and learning what it takes to take care of him, so you can be better prepared.
Second, the only way you are going to get paid as his caregiver, is if he qualifies for Medicaid. People who have the financial means, hire caregivers and pay directly. If you have exhausted all your assets and resources, and have no more than $2,000 in the bank, then Medicaid will pay for a friend or family member to provide care under the HCBS program (Home and Community Based Services).
Find out by first applying for Medicaid. Ask the Medicaid application worker about being his caregiver.
It will depend on how disabled he is, what his needs are, and every state has their own requirements. When I started this journey, we lived in Minnesota. Pretty much anyone could be his full time caregiver. That person had to choose a fiduciary representative to manage the budget and payroll. The budget is something that I worked with a case manager to create, and was submitted to the county for approval. My husband needed 24 hour supervision and care. The approved budget included his dietary needs, his incontinence supplies, pay for me (or someone else) as a caregiver, plus pay for respite care. Based on his income, there was a monthly co-pay amount, or spenddown amount, which was, on average, around $1,000 a month. However, I was earning enough as his caregiver, and he received Social Security disability income, so it was worth paying the monthly spenddown. It made up for my income lost when I quit my job.
We subsequently moved to Arizona. In Arizona, I have to be employed by a home care agency, and I need first aid/CPR certification, as well as annual continuing education units in order to keep my job. There is no monthly co-pay, but not as many things are covered, so it works out about the same.
Arizona, as in some states, will send a case manager to determine how many hours of care are needed each week. They will add up, in 15 minute increments, how long it takes to provide the needed cares. You may end up with 20 hours or less. In my case, I had to fight for 40 hours a week, because my husband can not be left unsupervised, so I got hours for supervision, and had to say, I refuse to do it for less. Fight for as many hours as you can get. It will cost Medicaid a lot more if he is placed full time in a nursing home for long term care. They are saving money by paying you to do the job.
The point I am trying to make is, every state has their own requirements, and you would do well to find out what the Medicaid HCBS covers in your state, before he comes home. And, have all the physical components ready in your home.
Be prepared for the emotional and physical exhaustion. It is the hardest job you will ever do. And, you will find yourself doing it without the support of your spouse, and you will become isolated from friends, and the outside world in general.
If he is a Veteran and is not in the VA system now is the time to get started on that.
Contact your local Veterans Assistance Commission or your States Department of Veterans Affairs and find out what benefits he may be entitled to.
What training do you have?