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My mom was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's. She has never admitted to anything being wrong with her...I don't know if she won't admit to it or truly believes there is not anything wrong (which I find hard to believe since she has problems with her words, can't really follow conversations - even though she will pretend she is, etc.)...I just get very frustrated because she still knows how to lie and/or cover things up?! Is this normal for the disease or what does this mean?

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My mom is the same way. She has never owned up to anything, and she has always lie/cover up things. ( things that don't even matter)She has eary on set dementia. I have been told by a psychology and a ALZ specialist that if she was like that before the disease she will continue to be that way but more so. The psychologist told me that my mom really believes what she is saying to be true.

In the research that I have done people with dementia/ALZ don't really know that something is wrong with them. Research has showen people with brian injuries ( due to a disease or injury to the brain) really don't know what they are doing is not normal. But like anything with the human body it varies from person to person. In my option, I think your mom really believes what she is saying to be true. I feel your frustration! Someone posted on here "think of it as she has a broken brain". And that is what I tell myself everyday. You can not get her into your reality. They see thing very different. I am still learning myself. This is just from what I am learning.
I think one of the hardest part about this disease is realizing that we want them to be the way they were in some cases. But that is like asking them to grow taller. It can't be done.
Best wishes.
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trtwaynelaw Sep 29, 2018
Thank you for taking the time to respond. My mom was diagnosed over 4 months ago, however, we just moved her in with us and there are things that I obviously see more now than I did when she lived on her own or in the senior apartment she lived in for one month. I never accuse or get annoyed with her. I don’t let her know I’m frustrated...she was not a liar before the disease and I just wondered because I know she can’t process information the same, but didn’t know how the brain still worked to where she knew how to cover something up or hide stuff/lie. Thanks again and good luck to you as well!
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She s not lying. This is part of the disease, her new world and normal. She is saying what she truly believes is the truth. Her reality. I suggest reading up on Alzheimer's and joint a caregiver support group. There is so much to learn about the disease and how best to address all the strange issues and behaviors that will arise. First, learn to live in her reality and do not accuse, correct or try to explain anything. She cannot reason, the brain is broken and it will get much worse.
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trtwaynelaw Sep 29, 2018
Thank you for taking the time to respond. My mom was diagnosed over 4 years ago...maybe I should have added that. I have read up on the disease and continue to research. I am also checking into local support groups especially now that we moved her in with us. I don’t accuse her or say she’s lying. I’ve learned that a while ago...that she can no longer process information and/or reason. I just wanted to know if it was a normal condition of the disease.
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Both things may be happening with your mother. If the ALZ is early onset and also in its early stages, she may be very frightened and trying to cover it up, both to herself and to you. She may be making herself believe that every symptom is just an accident, nothing serious. If she has a past track record of telling lies, then covering it up and denying problems may come naturally and seem like the best thing to do.

Of course this may be quite frustrating for you. But if you know the true situation, do you need her to come out and accept it right now? Would it make a lot of difference? If you mean to hang in there and help, you are going to need to develop a great deal of patience and understanding, so perhaps you treat this as a learning experience. It can be a bit like Alice in Wonderland – you can practice believing at least three impossible things before breakfast. Or at least, pretending to believe!
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trtwaynelaw Sep 29, 2018
Thank you for taking the time to respond. I guess I should have added, she was diagnosed with early onset over 4 years ago. I do not argue with her or accuse her or anything like that. I’m just asking for myself. Because I am “learning as I go” and she now lives with me.
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