I have been reading many posts over the last couple of weeks and today is the first time I am posting my own question. I am the FT caregiver to my 86 year old mom who has vascular dementia. This was a new diagnosis just before everything went into lockdown from Covid. And, like many others, her condition has been on a downward spiral ever since. I'm trying my best to keep her safe from virus exposure but at the same time, being cooped up all the time has really taken it's toll on her. We take her for drives, outdoor plant shopping, basic things like haircuts etc. but with the senior centers being closed, she has lost out on the interacting and phone calls don't seem to help very much. Each day is a surprising challenge. She has major sundowning hallucination/delusion issues and has difficulty sleeping through the night. She is often up and about around 1am when "visitors" are always in her room bothering her. She might be agitated and angry with us one day because it is our fault these "people" keep coming to her room every night or hysterically crying because she feels so sad. Sometimes we get both in one day. Her doctor explained to her that our minds play tricks on us when our brains get overwhelmed and tired and she just gets "outraged" that anyone can say she has dementia and that that is the cause of any of this. She has also woven impressively intricate stories to make sense of the hallucinations and her detailed explanations are absolutely incredible! She also had high anxiety for most of her life and that has only intensified with the dementia, making everything that much more challenging. We are working on medications and dosages to get her to sleep, alleviate anxiety etc. but what works one day, does not the next. We have tried all the suggestions and nothing seems to work. Redirecting leads to "you didn't answer my question" or "why are you ignoring what I said." My husband and I have to switch off our schedules so that someone can be with her at all times. I work PT and can at least flex during off hours and on weekends when my husband is home. He works FT but they are very understanding of our situation so he can be home some mornings if I need to be out. We are trying to get a caregiver for a few hours a week so we can take care of necessities and our own doctor's appointments without one of us having to stay home from work. Of course this has proven extremely challenging during the pandemic, not to mention her fighting even needing a caregiver every step of the way - "I'm fine staying home by myself!" Respite? Yeah, right. I am open to all advice and suggestions. I'm trying to do the right thing as a daughter but every single day is a test of my own character, patience (short end when they doled that out) and sanity. My husband? I'm not sure how many men out there could do this for a MIL but there is no way I could do this without him!!!