My mother will cry all day long sometimes and I'm at a loss. It's hard when she can't explain what's wrong or how she's feeling. I tend to get overwhelmed myself and I don't want her to see.
It's actually quite common to cry with dementia and I see it with my mother who's at the moderately advanced stage herself. Her emotions fluctuate between extreme anger/agitation/frustration and sadness. She infrequently seems to be peaceful or content, which is sad. But then again, as I always say, there is nothing 'good' about dementia for anyone; the patient, the family, the caregivers, nobody. It's a lose-lose situation for all involved.
I hope you can glean a few useful tidbits of info from the article. Just call her PCP if things don't calm down soon and perhaps another medication can be prescribed to help your mom.
Has she had a recent physical? Has blood work been done? Has this been occurring recently, or more recently than in the past?
UTIs and Thyroid issues and low vitamin D levels can all cause depression and changes in emotional responses.
Once the physical status has been sorted out, find out what her medical provider can offer her. Perhaps medication, perhaps a change of scenery, behavioral adjustment techniques. A psychiatric/psychological evaluation may be helpful.
Caregiving is an overwhelmingly hard job, so please don’t be critical of yourself. We all feel at some time or other that we could do better, And there are times when you just have to be content that you’re doing the best you can.
Be sure that you’re doing good, comforting things for yourself. You’re important too!
There is a condition called pseudobulbar affect which often accompanies dementia. The condition is characterized by episodes of sudden uncontrollable and inappropriate laughing or crying. There is medication available to treat it. Call her doctor.
May I add that with dementia, there are unlimited reasons for crying. Remember the old saying "Don't cry over spilt milk."? With dementia, that goes out the window.
My wife who has Advanced vascular dementia. will cry about anything and almost everything. Pain and anxiety, yes. Anything spilt whether she did it or someone else. Whether it was her drink, food, snack, or someone else's. She will cry if the TV does not "go to the channel" she wants.Noises, bath water not hot enough for her.
Dare I say she has cried for almost any kind of event at one time or another for almost a year.
BTW, the same thing with the word "ouch". It is no longer just for pain.
OMG - I say ouch - when I think something I hit is going to hurt - I call it my pre-emptive ouch. I've also always been an easier crier - the old pepsi commercial with all the puppies always brought tears to my eyes. (except in my 30s for some strange reason).
I hope that isn't a preview of coming attractions for me.
Hi Smokey I recently had this experience with DH aunt. It had never happened before. She’s always been an easy crier when something upset her, a death or frustration with life, but she would quickly recover. This was different. She was moaning and crying and praying. It went on for a couple of days. I gave her OTC pain pill in case she had pain she couldn’t express. Turned out to be constipation. I had called her doctor. We also doubled her antidepressant which seems to be working. It’s hard to deal with. I was thinking of taking her to the ER not knowing if she was in pain. I hope your mom is better soon.
So sorry for all the distress for both you and mom.
I'd make an appointment with her doc and have him do a full evaluation to determine if she has an UTI or other infection. If he can't find anything see if he can refer her to a specialist check her further. She also may need a mild anti-anxiety med to take the edge off. She may also be experiencing depression which also accompanies dementia.
Not being able to determine mom's distresses then distresses you too, so make sure to take good care of your self also. I will say - as a teenager - I would cry at the drop of a hat - and for no reason at all - it would really freak dad out and at some point make him angry; mom on the other hand understood (I think) that I just had to cry over nothing and we're not talking about tears streaming down my face but full blown sobbing - probably my reaction to raging hormones and the stress always below the surface in the home.
I would definitely get a full thorough checkup first, including blood work and urine culture. If nothing is found, then consider medication or specialist. It's better to rule out some condition that might be treatable before resorting to other medications.
My mother went through several days of moaning, crying and rubbing her leg. Doc Rxed Extra-strength Tylenol and ibuprofen. These are tough on the body, but without knowing the cause, what exactly are we treating? It really didn't seem to do much. I also took her to the ER. On intake, of course she said there's nothing wrong and could easily get up and onto the scale. Once in the ER, it was 4+ hours of moaning, wailing, crying and rubbing her leg.
They checked for a blood clot, but did not do Xrays (she'd had some about 8 or 9 months previously, but still, things CAN change!) Before discharge, they wanted to see her walk and use the toilet - it took 2 male nurses to assist her. She couldn't even stand to let me pull up her panties and pants, yet they discharged her anyway (one med, but it was really no more than the ibuprofen!)
I made appt with ortho and after begging, got them to move it up a bit. Of course by then the whole "episode" was over (one staff member was chastising me, saying I should take her to a clinic or another ER - for what? they don't have her records or history. Summed that up with a snide comment implying I preferred to see her in pain. >JERK<.) So, I explained what went on AND included that for a long time she used to say she needed to get her knees "done." Long before dementia. She never did, nor did she ask anyone to help her get it done. She was quite self-sufficient at that time. Anyway, he ordered Xrays and on return told me if she were 20 years younger, we'd be talking surgery. At her age, with dementia, nope. Even if he suggested it, I would have said no. I did ask about getting an injection (cortisone?), just in case. Whether it worked or just worked itself out or was something else altogether, who knows. The issue never presented itself again.
Other than that brief episode and some serious sun-downing during a UTI, she never exhibited anything like this. Most of the time she was fairly pleasant (grateful for that, as staff really liked her!) Quiet. Loved to sit and read newspapers, magazines, and the favorite - sales flyers or catalogues!
If this is totally out of character, it should be checked into first. If it was sudden onset, do get the blood and urine testing done - you mention UTI in your profile. Request urine culture - dip stick tests don't always catch the infection. Blood work might reveal an infection elsewhere. UTIs can do really odd things to elders, esp those with dementia. I was skeptic, but I have seen the light! Although her first UTI resulted in the sub-downing, subsequent UTIs presented as night time bed wetting, as in soaking everything, despite Max briefs AND a pad inserted. Another member of the forum had her mother start behaving out of the ordinary, urine tests were negative, but she actually had an infection in her mouth. Once treated, she resumed her "normal."
https://dailycaring.com/14-ways-to-handle-screaming-and-crying-in-dementia/
It's actually quite common to cry with dementia and I see it with my mother who's at the moderately advanced stage herself. Her emotions fluctuate between extreme anger/agitation/frustration and sadness. She infrequently seems to be peaceful or content, which is sad. But then again, as I always say, there is nothing 'good' about dementia for anyone; the patient, the family, the caregivers, nobody. It's a lose-lose situation for all involved.
I hope you can glean a few useful tidbits of info from the article. Just call her PCP if things don't calm down soon and perhaps another medication can be prescribed to help your mom.
UTIs and Thyroid issues and low vitamin D levels can all cause depression and changes in emotional responses.
Once the physical status has been sorted out, find out what her medical provider can offer her. Perhaps medication, perhaps a change of scenery, behavioral adjustment techniques. A psychiatric/psychological evaluation may be helpful.
Caregiving is an overwhelmingly hard job, so please don’t be critical of yourself. We all feel at some time or other that we could do better,
And there are times when you just have to be content that you’re doing the best you can.
Be sure that you’re doing good, comforting things for yourself. You’re important too!
My wife who has Advanced vascular dementia. will cry about anything and almost everything. Pain and anxiety, yes. Anything spilt whether she did it or someone else. Whether it was her drink, food, snack, or someone else's. She will cry if the TV does not "go to the channel" she wants.Noises, bath water not hot enough for her.
Dare I say she has cried for almost any kind of event at one time or another for almost a year.
BTW, the same thing with the word "ouch". It is no longer just for pain.
I hope that isn't a preview of coming attractions for me.
For yourself: Get help, get away, get exercise.
I have been through several rounds of getting help and I learned this:
Better to take an action a little bit too early than a little bit too late,.
If you are wondering if you should XXX, it is time for XXX.
I recently had this experience with DH aunt. It had never happened before. She’s always been an easy crier when something upset her, a death or frustration with life, but she would quickly recover. This was different. She was moaning and crying and praying. It went on for a couple of days. I gave her OTC pain pill in case she had pain she couldn’t express. Turned out to be constipation. I had called her doctor. We also doubled her antidepressant which seems to be working. It’s hard to deal with. I was thinking of taking her to the ER not knowing if she was in pain. I hope your mom is better soon.
I'd make an appointment with her doc and have him do a full evaluation to determine if she has an UTI or other infection. If he can't find anything see if he can refer her to a specialist check her further. She also may need a mild anti-anxiety med to take the edge off. She may also be experiencing depression which also accompanies dementia.
Not being able to determine mom's distresses then distresses you too, so make sure to take good care of your self also. I will say - as a teenager - I would cry at the drop of a hat - and for no reason at all - it would really freak dad out and at some point make him angry; mom on the other hand understood (I think) that I just had to cry over nothing and we're not talking about tears streaming down my face but full blown sobbing - probably my reaction to raging hormones and the stress always below the surface in the home.
I hope you can resolve her distress soon.
My mother went through several days of moaning, crying and rubbing her leg. Doc Rxed Extra-strength Tylenol and ibuprofen. These are tough on the body, but without knowing the cause, what exactly are we treating? It really didn't seem to do much. I also took her to the ER. On intake, of course she said there's nothing wrong and could easily get up and onto the scale. Once in the ER, it was 4+ hours of moaning, wailing, crying and rubbing her leg.
They checked for a blood clot, but did not do Xrays (she'd had some about 8 or 9 months previously, but still, things CAN change!) Before discharge, they wanted to see her walk and use the toilet - it took 2 male nurses to assist her. She couldn't even stand to let me pull up her panties and pants, yet they discharged her anyway (one med, but it was really no more than the ibuprofen!)
I made appt with ortho and after begging, got them to move it up a bit. Of course by then the whole "episode" was over (one staff member was chastising me, saying I should take her to a clinic or another ER - for what? they don't have her records or history. Summed that up with a snide comment implying I preferred to see her in pain. >JERK<.) So, I explained what went on AND included that for a long time she used to say she needed to get her knees "done." Long before dementia. She never did, nor did she ask anyone to help her get it done. She was quite self-sufficient at that time. Anyway, he ordered Xrays and on return told me if she were 20 years younger, we'd be talking surgery. At her age, with dementia, nope. Even if he suggested it, I would have said no. I did ask about getting an injection (cortisone?), just in case. Whether it worked or just worked itself out or was something else altogether, who knows. The issue never presented itself again.
Other than that brief episode and some serious sun-downing during a UTI, she never exhibited anything like this. Most of the time she was fairly pleasant (grateful for that, as staff really liked her!) Quiet. Loved to sit and read newspapers, magazines, and the favorite - sales flyers or catalogues!
If this is totally out of character, it should be checked into first. If it was sudden onset, do get the blood and urine testing done - you mention UTI in your profile. Request urine culture - dip stick tests don't always catch the infection. Blood work might reveal an infection elsewhere. UTIs can do really odd things to elders, esp those with dementia. I was skeptic, but I have seen the light! Although her first UTI resulted in the sub-downing, subsequent UTIs presented as night time bed wetting, as in soaking everything, despite Max briefs AND a pad inserted. Another member of the forum had her mother start behaving out of the ordinary, urine tests were negative, but she actually had an infection in her mouth. Once treated, she resumed her "normal."
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