My husband was diagnosed with MCI one year ago. I didn’t see major changes in his condition until this past September. Our third visit to the neurologist is next week.
Around September, I noticed his short-term memory was worse. He is now repeating himself in the same conversation. He also started having ED issues. He is having some issues with paying bills. He thought he paid 2 insurance policies, but found out he hadn’t. (He still refuses to relinquish control over paying bills.) I try to keep an ear open when I hear him talking on the phone, so that I can keep up on what he is doing (and to make sure he isn’t giving away the farm to some spam artist).
He couldn’t figure out how to plug in 6 lighted Christmas decorations. He said, “I know what has to be done, but can’t figure out how to do it.” So, he knows something is not right. It takes him 3 hours to complete seemingly simple tasks.
He seems increasingly insecure. We went to our son’s house for Christmas, and my husband seemed so uncomfortable. If I sat down, he sat down. Ditto, if I stood up and walked somewhere in the house. If I went outside, he went outside. Ditto if I came back in. He does that at our house, too. Sometimes, I just leave and go to the store by myself just to be able to breathe.
The only good thing while we were away was that he took a shower after I took did (which was every morning). At home, he takes a shower every 3 or 4 days, even though we discussed this at his last doctor appt.
When I wake up in the morning, I try not to move because if he knows I am awake, he always wants to put his hand on me. We have been married for 33 years. It was never like that.
We are building a house and moving out of state. (That’s been in progress for a year.) We are about 4-5 months away from moving. I am doing everything — from keeping in touch with the builder and financial institution to packing. I try to keep my husband informed about what is going on, but I know he won’t remember. I have been the one packing things we won’t need in the short-term. He can’t even make a decision about what clothes to get rid of. He tried twice.
The neurologist said (after the fact) that moving is going to be hard on him (to which my son said she had no right to opine about that…). Regardless, we are stuck in the contract. We will be closer to our grandkids; and I think it is a good neighborhood for us.
My guess is that he has moved from having MCI to mild dementia. The neurologist cannot diagnose dementia, though (she said). I thought initially that he had Parkinson’s, but he seems to have many of the same symptoms as vascular dementia from hypertension. He has been on Losartan for about 6 months, but he had high BP long before that.
I know his condition is only going to get worse. And, if it is vascular dementia, the life expectancy is less than Alzheimer’s. I am just overwhelmed at times. Sometimes I sit, not knowing what to do next. Then I find myself wishing that if something was going to happen to him, that it would happen before we move. Then I feel guilty. Ugh.