My mother is exhibiting behaviors of dementia, poor eating habits,agoraphobia, and refuses to have a physical. She has refused medical services 3 times but has many issues going on. How can I get help?

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Gretta63, you mentioned your Mom has agoraphobia [fear of the market place]... does your Mom bulk at wanting to go anywhere in the car? If yes, then there is your answer... she is using the excuse of not wanting to go the doctor when it is the agoraphobia doing the talking. Having agoraphobia can be pretty scary.

I had agoraphobia decades ago, how I hated to be in a crowd or standing in line that had more than one person... panic city... my safe haven was actually my car, couldn't wait to get of a store and behind the wheel. There were times when I panic just walking down the driveway to my mailbox. Yikes, glad that chapter is closed. I just traded one panic for another :P
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Are you living with her? I have given up on trying to get an adult to go to the doctor. I tell them one time. After that, do not rely on me to nurse you, because I am not a nurse.

My 95 YO mother was the same way. But, she lived alone. She finally fell and long story, short - she is now in a NH and is great. Clean, nutrition, companionship, hair dresser, etc.

So, my advice is "Do not help." Let her suffer the consequences. Good luck.

Have you read Dealing with our Difficult Older Parents?"
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