Mom died 2 years ago, a year and a half ago I had dad move in. It was my idea but not my plan. We had just come off a couple years of caring for my dying SIL and moving my BIL into a home after his stroke (long distance). I promised mom I'd look after dad and it was always the underlying message they would eventuality move in with us when the time came. It arrived much sooner than we anticipated. My house is set up well enough that he has his own living room, bedroom and shared hall bath (when the kids come home). I took the reins of dad as my siblings wanted nothing to do with it. We get along OK except for his way or may way gets to be a pain after a while. So while it was my idea (didn't want to drive 7 hours each way every 2 weeks when my sibling is in the same town). Fast forward to 2 years later and I have such overwhelming guilt. My wife and I have the mantra that "your failure to plan does not constitute my emergency", but it seemed to fly right out the window. All he has is SSI to cover his bills but that is it. No savings or other assets so all is on me. I cant leave the house for extended periods of time (like a weekend away with my wife) without having someone watch his and my dog (he is capable just not willing). I'm afraid he would leave the house open, all the lights on and dishes everywhere. We get along OK but I tire of his me myself and I talk. I have tried to get him into places to get social (church, worked a little of lodge) but he makes excuses. He goes out for lunch a lot and doesn't think I know (I advised him to save his money and eat at home like I do (I Work at home). I cant have him do projects unless I set it up and do most of the work (he is a carpenter by trade and has all his tools here). Not sure why i feel so guilty, I set him up to be cared for and no worries and he gladly accepted it. So why do I have all the guilt? Is it not guilt is it something else? Anyone else feel this way?