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How on earth do I cope with this huge stressful problem. My mum is pottering around the rooms and cluttering everywhere the house looks like its been burgled. Everywhere I go boxes clothes when I ask her what on earth shes doing she gets angry and says she cleaning up NO SHES NOT shes making a huge mess and just leaving stuff everywhere.

Im so tired and just cant keep this up its getting serious its very dangerous there's stuff everywhere and she can easily fall and break her neck.

I just cant reason with her and she just gets nasty.

Ive tried to call the nurse as she dosnt know about the diagnosis yet and ive really had no help or advice from the pros yet?

I have to get her to daycare centre or ill die before she does its just lately shes becoming obsessed with cluttering thinking shes doing something helpful its just so stressful.

How do I cope with this I need a professional to come in and assess the house its so dangerous.

This is the one part of dementia that has to be contained ive now read that a clear decluttered house is paramount not only for safety but makes them LESS confused which makes sense.

Its time to take control now and I cant argue with her alone I need back up this whole house needs to be decluttered for once and for all or she will hurt herself.

Gosh my mum was a stubborn woman but this is insaine.

Is anyone else going through this?

Even as im typing I can hear cluttering noises im afraid to go into the kitchen now as ive just made soup and cleaned the whole kitchen already HELP!!!!!!

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If she didn't have dementia, I would think she had done it to mess with me. It was really kind of funny. I can't explain anything as to the why. I had a thought that at the end of my life I was going to be told that I had been dealing with the Devil, who was testing just how far to push before I cracked totally.
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I think SCOTTY is pretty busy beaming people up in this job! Would be nice though if you could be beamed up everytime mum got on our nerves along with that pill.
You know shes sitting here watching most haunted then will sh..herself here one night when Im not here? I dont get it "if you try and reason with madness you get violence"
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JB check out youtube i laughed so loud! "cats taking dogs beds" so funny put me in a good mood!
Also a new band im listening to "kodaline" irish, listen to their new song and weep into your pillow I love this song but its soooo our lives and very sad but true song title is "life passes you by" so apt i listened to this the other night feeling so down then realised I have to get my life back on track and pretty damn quick! Doc says i need a holiday i said no doc I need peace a wk away aint going to cut it I need to be me again!

Oh silly you JB didnt you check the plugs first before you changed bulbs!!!! LOL
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I want one of those pills. My mother just said I needed to check the fuses because two lamps had blown their bulbs at the same time. I saw everything on the rest of the circuit was fine, so I knew it was the lamps. I put new light bulbs in, then turned them on -- nothing. Then I noticed they were both unplugged. Please beam me up, Scotty.
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Thanks JB am having a really tough time with her last week i was crying all over the place as the diagnosis came through and i was starting to grieve now this week im as batty as she is! I have this constant knot in my tummy whats she going to do next? Spent a night at my friends last night and came home to chaos she moved a huge coffee table by herself whats next?
everyday i have to learn to "let go" if she falls she falls. I cant keep having a panic eveytime she does something "MAD"
Today I went for a walk to clear my head the clutter is just so stressful and the worst thing is im up early and clean the whole house then late afternoon when all you want is some peace SHES OFF rummaging,half cleaning,putting products around stuff and leaving them there. House smells of urine am I a happy caregiver YIKES!!!!!!!!! There must be a drug that WE can take to make us laugh everytime they infuriate us a couldnt give a toss drug something to calm the nerves. Its all about them WE need drugs we could call it the "coping drug" a pill you just pop and everything they do makes you laugh AND gives you super energy.
Better go now have cooking and cleaning to do AND to RUB salt on my wounds this guy down the road ive fancied for years and havnt seen in about 6mths has gotten himself married and shes pregnant! How do you do that in 6mths he was single last time we met where the hell is MY LIFE! So fed up. As you can imagine my face...." IM SOOOOOOOOO HAPPY FOR YOU" i actually cried on the way home not just because I fancied him but what the hell have I done in 6mths ran around looking after MUM! really made me realise that my life needs to change and soon.
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I'm right there with you, Kaaza, in this rapid downhill slide. Right now I feel like I'm clinging onto the edge of a deep hole. Most of the time I feel like I'm doing okay, but the slightest thing is upsetting me. My reactions are not like me at all. Yesterday I woke up and realized that my mother hasn't been competent in years. She has seemed okay to people on the outside because I have been competent for her. I am starting to worry if I can still be competent enough for both of us as she is going downhill. I put out the family alarm today to let people know that all was not okay in the land of Oz. Sometimes it is the most we can do. We keep going and call out to family and the professionals for help. It sounds like your mother might benefit from something to calm her nerves and restlessness. Chances are she started out with a goal in mind, but lost the goal quickly, then started rummaging trying to recall what she is doing.

My mother went through a time when she was rummaging drawers and closets. It was nerve-wracking and messy. Fortunately, the phase passed quickly. Sometimes I asked what she was looking for, and sometimes she would answer and I would try to direct her some. Sometimes it worked and other times it didn't. I usually ended up coming behind her and straightening the mess that was made. When I straightened, I worked with her on it, so it didn't upset her more.

Going back to hanging onto the edge of the hole -- today I realized that I was having strong feelings and reactions that were not like me. I realized that I was afraid that something would loosen the dirt of my grasp and I would fall into the hole of total incompetence. It helped me to realize that I wasn't going crazy. I am just trying to hold things together without anyone extending a hand to help. The only people in our lives really don't care enough to get involved in a meaningful way. The professionals take the money and say good luck. The family says things look fine to them -- an easy out to not getting involved.

The only advice I have is see if there is a medication that helps, call in any backup troops you have available, and cleanup behind her, letting her participate in your reorganization. Most of all, realize that when you're feeling crazy that you're not. You are just having to be too competent to hold things together. Dementia is such a cruel thing.
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