Her health is failing. She can’t hardly use her hands now and needs surgery, but can’t afford it right now. She isn’t able to care for him the way he needs.
An aide comes twice a day (usually) but only sits with him for three hours. She works full time and is absolutely exhausted every day. She falls asleep talking to me on the phone. She is 52.
He is also disrespectful to her. She bends over backwards doing everything she can for him, and when she tries to explain her rheumatoid arthritis is crippling her hands and she can’t do for him like she needs to, he replies, "Well, what about me? I can’t do things, either!" He just doesn’t care about her, he only cares about himself.
I realize this is an unpleasant way to live, but saying mean and hateful and hurtful things to her isn’t helping the situation.
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good luck!
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Mom will get worse and stress makes arthritis worse (found that out the hard way!!) and she needs to put herself first.
Sounds like her son will fight her on being moved to a facility, but he's a grownup and needs to act like one, disabled or not.
How did he become bedridden? Is she letting him be a monster because she feels guilty?
His situation must be just awful, however, it is not a free pass to be a selfish, self-centered jerk off to anybody, especially the person helping him.
Does his condition affect his mind?
where is his father?
he can no longer live with you
He can hardly refuse - they’ll just wheel him out.
he does because he can
time to take back your power
find out who can help and after that’s done and date set - preferably with as little notice as possible to save the drama advise him you can cope and it’s time for him to move out and you look after yourself
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