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Jcharter1976 Asked July 2018

What do you do if one parent needs to be in a nursing home?

My moms currently in the hospital for pneumonia and has limited ability to walk. She’s lost most of her strength in her body. The hospital has approached her about going into a home. Now on top of all this she has dementia and I think it may be worse from the infection. My father who is still able bodied and takes care of himself can live at home. The question becomes if she’s placed in a home how is it paid for? My father and mother are on Medicare, social security and he has retirement income from the army. Would the state only take her ssi or hers and my dads to cover the cost? Trying to figure this out so any help would be awesome.

Daughterof1930 Jul 2018
My mother was in a nursing home while my dad remained at home. She was private pay along with a using a long term care insurance policy for a while, but when that ran out she was paid for by Medicaid. Her social security check went straight to the nursing home. My dad’s SS and his retirement pension remained untouched and went to him. He had to sell one car so that he only had one. Other than that nothing really changed for him. My mother’s care in the nursing home was no different when was private pay or Medicaid. The business office or social worker at the nursing home can guide you through this, they’re very experienced in the process

HolidayEnd Jul 2018
My mom is in assisted living while my dad is still at home. But they have saved a bundle of money and dad pays the facility plus many of her needs are covered by Medicare such as a wheelchair, physical therapy, a visiting RN, treatment at the doctors and hospital stays...

It’s a small facility with only 20 patients, personally I like the smaller more homey atmosphere. My dad visits her daily to sometimes every other day. So in that way it’s worked out well.

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TNtechie Jul 2018
My understanding is that for your mother, default is only your mother's SSI would be taken and your father's income would be left alone. If your father is not able to continue in his home with just his income, then the community spouse guidelines come into play. The elder law attorney is well worth his fee to make sure your parents get the best possible outcome.

97yroldmom Jul 2018
Hi Jcharter
its my understanding that Medicaid for one parent while the other is still in the community can be done without leaving the community spouse impoverished.
But it is complicated and you need a certified elder attorney to guide you to make sure you protect dad.

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