Aid & Attendance requirements AFTER approval?

Okay, I don't consider myself a mentally challenged person, but I feel totally insecure to answer these questions and know what the next steps are to get dads Aid and Attendance activated. The paper I received said the answer was yes, based on incompetence, but requires that he agree he is incompetent. Huh? it took me 3 months to get him settled down in ALF and he finally is. One thing I told him is that we could reconsider him coming back home AFTER his ALF (which he still doesn't understand) but he has finally stopped screaming at me that "I am not planning to stay here for the rest of my life, young lady". he has come such a long way. his meds have been adjusted and his agitation calmed without total grogginess... He's worse physically---cant walk---hard to even transfer---and he's lost a whole lot of weight, but that is probably due to the fact he cant consume empty-calorie, make- you- fall-and-break-your (fill in bone)

Anyhow, really? I got to get him to sign this? I don't even know who to turn to on this. the elder law attorney cost me too much and I wasn't happy with her insistence that dad appy for Medicaid, which turned out to be right, cause with Aid and Attendance, he wont require Medicaid. but I also don't want to ask an insurance guy. and I have read but do not understand the website stuff. they say I should have asked to be considered the fudiciary when I applied? I did...

Anyhow know?