How do you deal with a sweet old lady who is a wolf in sheep's clothing?

The Borderline Waif seldom exhibits the harsh or volatile traits we've come to associate with other BPD types. It is the rest of the behaviors that frustrate me. Learned helpliness, victimization, neediness, self pity, sympathy seeking, etc.
How do you deal with a sweet old lady who is a wolf in sheep's clothing?