I have been a reader here for several years and am appreciative of advice, tips, resources I have received. But I don't understand why peeps try to hide assets. Medicaid is already very difficult to get. Mine will be applying for it at 93. Dementia of Alzheimer's nature, in Memory Care since Nov 1.

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My deceased husband and I were both savers. When he got cancer, insurance covered much of his medical and hospital costs. But at the end I could afford the extra help that he needed. We also had planned well for each other in the event one of us passed a younger age. That planning has made things very easy for me. We didn’t have children so I am now doing the necessary planning for aging alone. I have a sister with young children, but I would never want to be a burden on her or her family.

EXACTLY how I felt, and TOTALLY AGREE! My ONLY WISH was that my mom had spent more of HER MONEY on herself BEFORE she needed residential care, but I was happy to be able to place her in a silver spoon nursing home and provide for all the personal and medical supports available to her until she died at 95.

NO REGRETS! She knew we loved her and she enjoyed a wonderful life during her last 5 1/2 years.

I read this story last year and it helped me put my current plan in place. Things have changed for the better in Nevada since and now I feel this state is working to protect the elderly.
Thanks for the link.

When I was a kid my parents were beyond “frugal”. So beyond. You know the old term “penny pincher”? I’ve always said my mother could make a penny scream.

As a kid I resented it. My friends went to Disney Land - we went camping. The first store bought outfit I ever had came when I was 13 years old. Prior to that it was “hand-me-downs - and I had brothers!!!

By the time my parents hit the declining years of old age they had a mighty nice sum stashed away. An amazing amount really - for two retired teachers with three kids they helped put through college.

But when both my parents had a medical crisis at the same time - and it was clear they could no longer live in their home... Let me tell you - all of a sudden all those years of resenting home-made cloths, brothers Levi’s (before it was cool for a girl to wear) and Kraft Mac & Cheese melted away and I was grateful.

Mom and dad could afford a very nice IL and paid caregivers from reputable agencies. By the time my dad passed they were bringing in 18 hours of help - everyday.

There were lots of other expenses along the way. Lots. But this is what my parents saved for. They saved for their retirement, their declining old age and for the ability to have choices in their lives and their care - as old age took its toll.

Three years after daddy passed my mom had to be placed in a nursing home. Moms medical needs and her dementia made it impossible to keep her safe in a less restrictive environment. But how lucky was I that I could pick the very best NH I could find for my mom? Never once did I have to worry about paying for it - this was a part of what my parents planned for - saved for.

As my parents caretaker and DPOA - never once did it occur to me to go cheap with my parents care - so there’d be more for me later.


As the DPOA - I handled the accounts and wrote out the checks and I know my parents care over a six year period was at least $300,000.00
Would I have liked to have inherited that chunk of change? OH HELL YES!!! No doubt about it. I probably could even make the argument that THEY wanted me to inherit the money. Or - justify it by saying I needed the money...

It was their money that they worked hard for - they scrimped and saved for. And in the end - I know they were proud to have made it - paying their own way.

To be clear - I have no problem with people in real need getting assistance by way of Medicaid. It what we do in a compassionate and civilized society. We take care of the less fortunate and needy.
But do not take my hard earned tax dollars to pay for someone else’s care - while money is hidden and stashed away so you can have it - inherit it. Why should I pay for you?

Frankly - it’s the same as stealing, IMO.

Hiding assests to collect Medicaid is theft and I think that anyone caught doing it should serve jail time. They are lining their own pockets at the expense of the taxpayers.

All this government aid is not sustainable but people don't care as long as they get theirs.

Sickens me

Those of you who may read that article and think my gosh. This is answer to a prayer. I can outsource due to fraught relationship with elder. For whatever reason.
Think again. Their fees often higher. But here's the thing. Once estate runs out of money, they resign. And you are right back where you started. But now, with no money. Think about this. Long and hard.

New Yorker article link here

More backstory. We have a guardianship. We were POA too. But that has limits.

Poa are easier to get and exploitive to elder potentialy. Gshps harder and more expensive. If you have not read article in the New Yorker, how the elderly lose their rights, you should read. These popup guardian ship shops will be a more frequent occurrence as the population ages. Be aware. I work for a very large law firm. I am not a lawyer and will not represent myself as one. I might be able to direct questions of a specific nature. Don't ask me legal questions though. I am glad I finally joined up. Reader for a few years..

Thanks all.

This is a question I’ve often wanted to ask myself. Assets are for care. Not keeping for inheritances. My sister and I inherited little because we paid in full for both of parents care. Our parents expected us to do that.

Maybe I should add some backstory. My sister and I got involved in my mother's finances only last year when she was hospitalized. And diagnosed. Downward spiral since. We have always known we would not inherit anything. Her assets were hers for her care. They are meager. She has outlived them. Basically.

We are being good stewards of them, but I don't understand those who won't use for parent's care.

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