I realised people couldnt read my pic so I have one of me now but this si what it said for those of you who asked.

1. When you are lost in the haze that is Alzheimer's I cry .. a lot
2. I want for you to be happy but I dont know whether you are
3. That hurts
4. I don't know how frightened you are
5. I'm not perfect as a care Mum but I do try
6. I watch over you when you sleep at night and hold your hand until you stop being restless
7. When you fall the fear in your eyes breaks my heart
8. When you ask to die I die inside because I can't help you
9. Just because I am cross with you sometimes, it doesn't mean I have stopped loving you
10. I hate your disease but I would do it all again because you're my mum

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Oh captain I do try but sometimes she is such a pain in the proverbial I have to walk away saying do what you want Mum I am just trying to keep you safe. Then of course she lays the guilt trip on me ...I can't do anything right.....well that would be about it of late...she wont do her exercises without a major argument, she wont use her walker (well wouldnt until I hid her stick and she had no choice - I hid it because she kept hitting me with it) She wont eat meat - because shes a vegetarian (except for chicken and mince and the very occasional hot dogs and burgers - so I think she means she CANT eat meat not that shes a vegetarian) We argue every time I ask her to drink, I NEVER bring her the clothes SHE wants to wear even if I bring her ones she asks for I will have gotten the wrong socks or wrong vest ...rant over!

i doubt there is such a thing a a perfect dem / alz carer . if you let your mother have as much control of her surroundings as possible you will avoid the major source of agitation in elders -- loss of control .
best of luck to you both .

Nicely put. Keep the Faith.

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