If don't have Power of Attorney for my mother can I still take her out of a nursing home and have her live with me?

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yrs, 55 in her apt which was emptied and no longer hers-i wasnt told ,i never did any going thru of her things-i dont feel my brother is giving her the kind of care she deserves-he has her in a nh far from her frinds and me-she keeps telling me to bring her shoes and come close quickly ,hedoesn visit- butnot for any lenght of time-he doesnt feel her the way i do-i am the elsdest-he is the youngest-mom and i have a speial bond iknow this isworse for her thanme and itsperetty badforebut he has control not sure howhe managed to get her to take my name off of the edical POA, but he did-he keeps me as out of theinfo /med loop as possible
i have to jump thru hoops toget any real answers and not the answers that are usually given
that will be what general and not personal ;like oh she is ok, ot like oh she is fine everything is ok= hard to get details
i am worried about her
it is a clean place,but understaffed, not alot ofindividual care, and basically a ware house for medicated elderly people,that are medicated,and frustrated,and left to just rant and rave---things can be done to help calm people down- without having to medicate them into zombie land-
but this isnt good for her
she deserves better
any ideas ?anyone had similar experience?
im disgusted-
she is frightened and wants me close talks about death if she doesnt get out of there=
but when i ask- she is doing fine-
bull.

Answers 1 to 10 of 30
You would have to get your mother, if she still of sound mind, to make the change from your brother to you. If not you would have to prove to a court that he is not meeting his responsibilities as POA. This will become very messy.
Coach is correct....if your mother is still sound mentally, have an attorney draw up a new POA, have mom and you sign and notorized. That's it, done. And make sure the POA details that you control all medical and financial issues. It needs to be done that way to keep any confusion down. My husband and I have complete POA for his mother. I had medical only for my mother and it was a real pain to have to get my brother to sign a handful of checks so that I could pay her NH bill every month. And then when she passed away, my brother who had not seen her for years by his own choice, just barged right in and made all kinds of arrangements for burial. So it's best to have it all in one document. Hope this helps. Good Luck!!!!
s POA does that given him the right to ,not include me in cleaning out her house?
to empty and remove and refuse to gie me any details-reasons- is that right?
i dot understand--but then again-a great deal of this whole process is very cruel.
Who signed her in?

Who has both Medical and Financial Durable POA now?
See a lawyer.
brother
You should check with an attorney. If your brother has the POA- he has the power to limit your access to mom so I'd make a phone call to your attorney ASAP.
Just went through alot of this. If you mother is of sound mind. She can have some dementia and still be able to do this. Go to an attorney for around $100 and have his Power of Attorney revoked and notarized which they will do there. You can also print on online at legal zoom or somewhere like that and get it notarized as well. If you can get you hands on a copy of your brother's POA that will help you revoke it a little easier. That's all it takes and you can get your mother out of there and put her in a nicer facility. If you cannot have the POA changed for some reason you can also contact your local Department of Aging-Protective Services and they will investigate for you. They just helped me out tremendously as my sister had POA and hid all my mothers money and when she was revoked would not give up her POA to new POA. Department of Aging can investigage for elderly abuse meaning she is not getting proper care and he is withholding you as her daughter from certain things.
wow- unbelievable- so much of this goes on is horrible- but maybe human nature?
idont know- too many things to take care of now- later i can delve into human behaviors ,etc.
and thisworked for u?????
going to check this out-
found a lawyer- but also had issues of my brother sueing me -fathers estate- but i wanted this lawyer to help with moms deal too- she was going to charge 500 for dads isues, and said since mom was in mass. she had to refer me to someone there- i dont think i am comfortable hiring this lawyer-
thanks sp much for sharing- lots of great info-
love
k
Top Answer
Yes. It all did work out for us. The day Protective Services spoke to my sister she agreed to turn over all mom's money to my uncle and wrote him a check last week. My mom got most of her money back. I think sister still took some and hid it but she had 5 different accounts going and Protetive services found them all. Please contact them. They are there to keep the elderly from being exploited either physically or emotionally or financially. Do not pay $500.00. Mom paid $225.00 for both her POA and a new will. Shop around. There are also places for the elderly here in Pittsburgh that charge a small amount to get new POA's and wills done. It doesn't take a great deal of time to find out where they are. Just type in the internet for Elder Abuse attorneys or help. Good Luck and go for it. I was scared at first to go after my sister but when I saw the smile on my mom's face when she got her money back, it was all worth it. Take care of you mom if you know in your heart your brother is just not doing something right!!!! keep us posted of you progress.
you are giving me a gift of hope-thankyou-
tried to speak to mom about 1hr ago- nuse -ot on pfloor- only 1 cna-, asked to have dr call me back- pn vacation- so please leave mess- or give me office #-she said - oh i dont have any number for him-what a crock!!so, getting ove the 45 min ridiculous
conversations, i am now taking a break for some oj- and then head into the legal areas-
thanks-
late
love u
k

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