In relationship with a 77-year-old widower who has dementia.

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Children hate me; accuses me of stealing his clothes; took me out of his will out of anger

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My heart goes out to you. It is terribly painful when a loved one developes dementia. It just adds to the pain when family members throw up obstacles.

Paranoia is often a part of dementia. It is not rational -- it doesn't have to make sense. Why on earth would you steal your sweetie's clothing? Try not to take these accusations personally. It is the dementia speaking.

I am very sorry that this irrational anger drove him to remove you from his will.

What are your specific questions or concerns you'd like to discuss with us?

Some additional information would be helpful. Are you living with this man? Are you providing caregiving services? Are his children willing/able to take good care of him? How long have you been in this relationship? How long has he had dementia? How severe are his present impairments?

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