Moving back into dysfunction.

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I had to move back in with my dysfunctional parents who are in their 70's. My dad us passive aggresive. My mother is a manipulative, control freak, verbally abusive bully. She goes from being nice to psycho in a second and vice versa. Living with them was hell the first time around. I lost my job and then my house and had to move in with them and my pets. She likes to tell me how I will never move out again and I need to acceot it. She convinced my brother who is as mentally unstable as her to leave his full time job and move in with them to work part time. She is big on triangulation and pitting us against each other. I avoid her as much as I can. For the past month or so she is on this new kick of demanding hugs from me and her jerk son. I got out of it last night. I want nothing to do with her as she bullies me and verbally abuses me constantly. I cannot afford to get out if here. I blocked her emails years ago because she sent nasty emails. I blocked her phone number so she can only leave a message. I am only grateful that I am able to keep my pets as I consider them more of a family then my actual family. She also tries to convince me I am my brother have some kind of mental disorder. My therapist say I dont. Her and my brother may be bipolar. I dont know what they have. He randomly will become hostile to be and ignore me for no reason. I was told I am not allowedin the kitchen when he is in there it upsets him too much. I feel like I am in prison and reliving my childhood hell. She has also gone through my boxes several times and taken stuff out and aslo just taken stuff as I find it in other parts of their house. My dad does nothing when she screams and yells at me. Even when I did have a house she would come out and take it over and treat me like dirt. When I move I wont tell them where I move to and I plan on putting my house in a land trust so my name isnt attached. But she will.probably hire a private investigator to find me. She has noboundaries. I only say that about a private investigator based on past experience. I am really stressed out and frustrated and just want to get out of here and cut them out of my life. I cant find a fulltime job to do it. I save every little bit I can from my part time job. They dont even know I have a part time job, if they did they would demand I give them money. My dad goes along with whatever, she says as he has been whipped over the years. I dont know what to do, I am not living, I am just surviving looking for an escape. When I do move out if I an I am basically sneaking moving out to avoid her drama of saying really nasty stuff and trying to say I am taking any of her stuff and who knows what else. I am constantly battling daily depression here and feel hopeless and paralyzed. Everything feels like so much effort having to deal with this again. She has had cancer but its gone. She has always screwed with me mentally and now she uses cancer as a way to try to manipulate me saying she is dying it will come back. Demanding I give my brother a hug to break his cycle of hostility towards me before she dies. That jerk can deal with his own hostile issues towards me on his own. I cant deal with their inconsistent behavior towards me being nice one second then mean the next.

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It's going to take more tough love than you ever knew you had, but they need a facility that is trained to handle this type of personality. My similar story is in my Amazon ebook "Bold Actions for Helping Aging Parents". Apply for Medicaid if you qualify and do what you know you have to do. It will be best for everyone involved. You've been a good daughter now be a kind daughter and do what is necessary.
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You did not say if you own a car. When I was a teen, living at home, I was lucky enough to have a car and it was my great escape. It took me down to the river, over to friends homes and I sold rides to my friends for the gas money. I would even go outside and sit in my car to avoid the situation, which was in no way as bad as yours.
Find your great escape. There's a ledgend about one of the constellations, Andromeda. she is know as the chained woman. Look up the myth at your local library. As an astrologer, I was in a class with a very wise woman. She taught us about the hidden meanings of the stars and constellations. She said to notice the brightest star in the Andromeda constellation. It's the winged horse Pegasus. It is in the middle of Andromeda's forehead. She said that the deeper meaning is that in your mind you are free. Free yourself in your mind and the rest will follow. It's hard to get out of a dark forest in the middle of the night, but remember when you're going through hell, keep on going. Don't turn back. You may be more than half way there. Escape in little ways. Stay away from the kitchen and the common areas of the house as much as possible and enjoy the company of your four legged kids. They are your comfort right now.
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Take the advice I have seen given to you. Go to the YWCA or to a shelter. Or find a job as a live in caregiver for someone who is sick and not deranged. You have had enough of that. If you have a church ask for help or advice from them. They may know someone who needs live in help. If you have a car, lock your best stuff in it and hide the keys. God Bless you. Verna
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I did it once before (not to get away from parents) But go to an abuse shelter. They will help you to get back on your feet. Place until you can, you are a safe place to live. They will help you get through this, listen and so on. There is a lot of help there, with anything you need. You don't need to abuse, there is ways to get away. Never think you have to stay there. Must YWCA "oldest women's organization" Allows women to stay there and will also help. Just call the Abuse hot line and tell them what you going through and ask if there is a shelter close by you can go to. Also look up the YWCA and see what they have. But never never think you have to stay in an abuse house. Because you don't, there are programs that can help. Good Luck - Best to you
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I would live under a bridge get out as soon as possible
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Know that this situation will not last forever, it is a temporary measure. Please do not get pulled into this trap any further. Try to distance your emotions for now and get to the business of removing yourself. You can heal from this.
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There is really only one solution to your situation and that is to get a job and move out. In your situation I would be glad that I had my parents to fall back on while I got back on my feet. I'm sorry the situation is not better there, but it does give you the opportunity to get back to work and on your own again. I would say to make the most of it. Let the anger go. It will eat you up.
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So what is your question? You never say and just vent about your situation. Since it is so bad try to get some help to move out and then do not allow your family access to you, no matter what. If someone came to my house and I did not want them there, I would call the police and charge them with trespassing.
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Oh my goodness Captain, let me give you an attaboy! I love animals but I have seen how much my girls little dogs(whom they adopted while in college on my tab without asking me) cost them and the trouble they create. One bites men, one pees a lot, they are all barkers (heck they are chi's) and when the girls go anywhere, they have to hire someone to come take care of them.

Only one of my girls has given away her pet (a kitty) to a good home. Why? She, her husband and baby moved across the country and she just had different priorities.

I love animals and there are agencies who will help you with their care and food. But people need to consider their financial situation before adopting pet. Vets are expensive now days.
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My case isn't as extreme, but it is the light version of yours. Meds help, and just keep planning on your escape. Honestly I think about people who have been wrongly imprisoned and how they survive. It is possible, but you must have a strong self, and since you are aware of the dysfunction, you do have a strong self. Be strong, keep planning the escape and try to only think about the positive and see this experience as an exercise on how to keep sanity in an insane circumstance.
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