This life is so bad I don't want it to be extended.
I'm 52. She 80. She attacks me. Beats me. Verbally slaughters me. I'm bruised and battered but I was a bad kid, partied and I was a disrespectful brat. Now my guilt has surpassed and determined me to take it at all costs. Even my death. Perhaps that's because from the age of 6 she took me out of bed at 2:30 am every morning to show me my dad Vomiting on furniture. She also told me he raped her all the time. No way. He could not take her on. He couldn't stand. I have Hep C and was upset I was going to die. Now I'm not. I hope it kills me soon. Like tomorrow. She will outlive me. By the way before she just broke her ankles and could get out she is known as the sweetest little old lady in the world. She is a total shopoholic. I have 2 deadly diseases that could kill me at 60 or 70. The doc not sure. I will be dead in a year from an aneurysm. I found out a year ago and I will be getting demtia myself rom brain injury I found myself. I think of dying everyday but I will let God decide. Please God. Beam me up. Please.