This life is so bad I don't want it to be extended.

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I'm 52. She 80. She attacks me. Beats me. Verbally slaughters me. I'm bruised and battered but I was a bad kid, partied and I was a disrespectful brat. Now my guilt has surpassed and determined me to take it at all costs. Even my death. Perhaps that's because from the age of 6 she took me out of bed at 2:30 am every morning to show me my dad Vomiting on furniture. She also told me he raped her all the time. No way. He could not take her on. He couldn't stand. I have Hep C and was upset I was going to die. Now I'm not. I hope it kills me soon. Like tomorrow. She will outlive me. By the way before she just broke her ankles and could get out she is known as the sweetest little old lady in the world. She is a total shopoholic. I have 2 deadly diseases that could kill me at 60 or 70. The doc not sure. I will be dead in a year from an aneurysm. I found out a year ago and I will be getting demtia myself rom brain injury I found myself. I think of dying everyday but I will let God decide. Please God. Beam me up. Please.

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Patty, offer your mother her medication, with water. Ask her nicely, encourage her, but don't beg or argue - this is for her benefit, not yours after all. If she refuses it, she refuses it. You call the doctor and inform him/her that your mother refused her medication. It goes on record. If she gets worse, this is all information that will help towards stepping up the support she and you can access - right to the point where her legal capacity is called into question.

How have things been lately? I'm sorry to read that you had to go to a funeral, an untimely one by the sound of it.
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Yes she needs to add to her medication. The doctor offered her it. Who wants to volunteer to get her to take it. She would not use her boot when she broke her foot recently.
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I am not suicidal. I ve made to 52. I'm not ending it now. No way. I'll figure it out. I just went to a funeral where that may have been involved. This site has been very helpful.
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Your Mom may need medication. You need to get her evaluated. You need to get ur Office of the
Aging involved. You can't continue to live like this. It's up to you.
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If she is to the point of causing injury to you, I beg you to call EMS to get her admitted and medicated appropriatly. Bring the pictures with you to show the doctors. Life can get so much better from there. Once she is back home and causing problems again then do it again. If you are half owner of the home and she needs Medicade, you can remain in the home for your lifetime. If your mom gets hospitalized you can get that information from social workers
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If you are suicidal which your post seems to indicate, PLEASE call National Suicide Prevention Lifeline NOW:
1-800-273-8255
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Does loving your mother mean you have to live in the same house as her? My kids don't live with me. I'm still pretty confident that they love me.

What I'm saying is that you can love your mother, you can ensure she is well taken care of, you can do all kinds of things to support her and cherish her. But none of them *has* to mean standing there and taking it while she abuses you.

Does it never cross your mind to wonder what her behaviour does to her own spirit, let alone yours? Do you think she never feels bad about what she's doing? What must all that anger and left-over hatred be doing to her when she takes it out on her own child?

What will happen to her when you do abandon her, like it or not, by dying?

Go back to your doctor and ask for help.
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Have you had a mother that is not June Cleaver. I love her. I want to love her. She is a very caring good person that has worth. She loves Animals. She just doesn't like me. Why. Pick a reason. Any reason. You know this is in older years and she has always been a spare the rod mother. She was my mommy until I was about 12. A good mommy. Do I feel sorry for her yes. Maybe she went mental when her brother drowned in 3 ft of water while serving our country training in the states because the cop on scene did not want to go in water to car because he did not want to get his boots dirty. I'm human. She's just so sick. Multiple Personality. She obviously can't help it.
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Why didn't you leave 2 years ago, after taking the video?
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By the way all. What doesnt kill you makes you weaker. I know. The stronger end is a lie. A myth. Ignorant
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