When is the right time to move into a nursing home? I think I know that you can't predict exactly how a patient will progress but I want to know which stage we're dealing with. My mom had to move out of the AL because of combativeness, refusing meds, pushing attendants, etc. She's now in memory care, after a recent visit to a mental health facility to adjust her meds. She's getting more combative. Won't take her meds, curses and hits at the attendants. Throwing dishes in the dining room.
Physically, she does pretty well. Her blood pressure is under control. She has congestive heart failure, but she's been dealing with that for decades.
The MC nurse wants me to change doctors because her doctor is not being responsive, wants to discontinue waking her for night time bathroom visits and let her sleep late in the morning due to combativeness. She may wake up wet, but they'll add extra pull ups. They also want to increase her meds.
I want to keep her out of a nursing home as long a possible, because of quality and costs. So, I'm agreeable to their requests. She's in a really nice place that's clean and most of the time she seems happy.
When she had to move out of the AL, I knew it was coming, but I evidently, didn't really because I thought we'd have another year or more. My expectations a non-clinical caregiver seem to be very different from reality.
When we switch to this new doctor I would like to get him to tell me which stage she is in and what to expect as far as progression. I know medicine is an art as well as a science, but is this too much to expect?
So, what is the best what to handle this request with the doctor? Other physicians have not been helpful with this issue.
Also, is keeping her out of a nursing home a good idea. When she was in AL I did everything I could to keep her from moving to memory care. But, after experiencing it, I wished I had moved her sooner.
Have you had regrets of moving someone from memory care into NH? Did you wait too long or wish you had never moved them?