My husband drove to my daughter's house, told her he had her daughter with him and was taking her home (she no longer lives there, she's married, living in her own home). He said she was sitting next to him in the passenger's seat. She told him there was a cardboard box on the passenger's seat and no one was with him. He then said "Oh, she must have jumped out down at the corner". He proceeded to say, I have to find her. We are legally separated, no longer live together. He lives in an apt. by himself (the VA told him he could take care of himself).

That same day, he called me and said "Whenever I leave here I lock the door, so I don't know how anybody could get in here, but someone has been sleeping on my couch. They took some blankets and I can tell they've been sleeping there. He also insisted that his footstool was tipped over on its side and all the stuff he had on it was scattered all over the floor.

Another time, he called and wondered when I went home. He insisted that I stayed all night. Or, he will be in the bedroom and insist that there were a lot of people in his living room and says I was there, vacuuming....there have been several incidents such as this.

He's convinced that I'm having an affair with a doctor, says he's seen us go into motels, etc., etc., of course, there is absolutely no truth to any of this.

He should not be driving, even though an occupational therapist actually passed him. He was passed with many stipulations: no driving out of town, no driving while smoking, on the phone, at night; and he drives doing all of these things. He actually drove to a relative's 450 miles from here and had an accident. He had another minor accident here in town. He drives by here all the time, one night in the dark with his lights off, he has followed me any times. When I was running errands he followed me from one place to the other. A few months ago I was at a friend's house, when I left I went to a drive-up for carry-out and I saw him behind me when I was getting my food. 30 minutes later, he called and told me how long I was at my friends house and knew what I had for supper.

At what stage of dementia is this behavior. Since we're legally separated, I'm no longer responsible for him, but I'm very concerned. I have no legal right to do anything. Most of his behavior is directed toward me.

Thanks for any help, I'd really like to know if anyone has an idea how far he has progressed into the dementia.

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Hallucinations could be result of a number of things. I've experienced with my mom (91) on several occasions, though not recently. She has early dementia.

It could be a UTI, dehydration, medications (interactions and or he is no longer taking properly), mal nutrition, loneliness and isolation.

For my mom, when she is isolated, stays in the house without any interaction for long periods, and stops taking care of herself, she will have hallucinations, paranoia, obsession, etc. they are very real to her and scary to witness.

I try to give her a snack, protein drink and take her out for a walk, etc. to change the venue and this seems to return her to reality.

I would take him to the dr. Or send a letter to dr documenting your observations and concerns. Then dr is aware and can do thorough work up and make recommendations.
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I hope he doesn't have a gun. His stalking you and accusing you of having an affair scares me. I suggest you go to the police about the stalking. Change your phone number and don't give it to him.

Has he been diagnosed with dementia? Hallucinations can come from all sorts of things besides dementia, including going without sleep for a long time (my husband once hallucinated a man in a tuxedo standing by the side of a deserted road in the Jersey Pine Barrens while riding his bicycle on a multi-day bike race, after not sleeping for 36 hours.) Certain drugs can cause hallucinations as well as alcohol. So can schizophrenia. And sometimes brain tumors. And certain toxins. Even UTIs. There could be lots of reasons why your husband is hallucinating, but it's really disturbing that he's become fixated on you and is shadowing your movements. Can you cut off contact with him?
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My mom started having hallucinations two years ago. She was in stage 5-6 (more 6) at that point It was total psychotic breaks from reality, that was the point we had to put her in a facility. Those only lasted for a couple weeks and didn't return until last week when she had a UTI. She is now is Stage 7-pretty much the end of 7. She has early-onset Alzheimers so not sure if that makes a difference.
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"Stages" of dementia are more of a diagnostic tool than a checklist for families to refer to. There is no looking at all the symptoms and saying, "OK, dad does this and that so that means he's in Stage ____". The symptoms of dementia are clustered and often overlap. Go by the behavior when dealing with your husband as opposed to what stage he's in.

He's at the "shouldn't be driving or living alone" stage. The VA told him he could live by himself? I'm not sure if the VA is a good source of information right now. Call Adult Protective Services before he hurts someone. You can call anonymously.
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It's not really stage related.

Certain kinds of dementia have hallucinations.. For instance Lewy Body or Parkinson's..

Also I would have him checked by a doctor for a UTI..

I'm really not that knowledgeable about hallucinations but others on here are..

ALSO he should not be driving. He might kill someone.. Tell his Dr about his behavior ASAP...
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