Just like everyone else, Covid has limited me to phone contact with mom who is in a memory care unit. I live across the country too, so I have not seen her since November of 2019 (went in for a Thanksgiving visit and dad passed while I was there--will always be truly grateful I could be there). Of course, mom's AD has progressed over this time. She is now at the point where she really can't even complete a sentence. But I know she has complete thoughts because she gets so frustrated not being able to say things. She did manage to tell me during out last phone "visit" that she does not know who I am. This too is to be expected. Unfortunately, mom has never been able to understand virtual visits, so that is not an option. I just don't know whether to continue calling to talk to her. On her unit, the staff answers the phone and takes it to the residents. More often than not, mom ends up getting upset because she cannot communicate, even if she was having a "good day" prior to the call. Then the staff has to deal with the aftermath of my call. And now that mom doesn't know who I am, I can't imagine she needs to hear from me. A big part of me still wants to call to hear her voice and tell her I love her. And, of course I feel like I'm abandoning her if I don't call. But if it mostly upsets her, and makes more work for the staff, then I feel like I'm being selfish by calling. I did tell staff I likely would not continue asking to talk to mom for all the reasons I've explained above, and I asked if I could call them just to check on her. They of course said I could do that any time. I would just like to hear from you folks as to whether you would continue to try to talk with mom. Thank you so much for sharing your hard-earned wisdom. Hugs to you all!