Running into problems using my POA or DPOA. Any advice?

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It seems no matter what I attempt to do.I hit a Brick Wall when it comes to this Durable Power of Attorney "Attorney in fact".

About the client,
I have a Aunt that's 88 yrs old. As of now she's legally compatent. Her doctor never told her she is incompatent. She has dementia but, not taking medication for dementia prescribed by a doctor. I was told by many attorneys I talked to that, if she was never told by a doctor incomapebt and has not been prescribed by a doctor medication for dementia. The Aunt is legally compatent until told other wise by a doctor. There for she 100% compatent to do what she desires. Yes it true, a person can be diagnosed with dementia and still be legally compatent until their told other wise by their doctor or prescribed medication for dementia by a doctor. That is the legal twist between dementia and incompatent.

Attorney in fact, When to start acting on your DPOA or POA. I was told when the client can no longer do things correct on their own or as some call it incompatent. Well, that's one Brick Wall I ran into as DPOA. My Aunt the Clent, is incompatent in my eyes. She refuses to go into a nurcing home, She refuses to spend a dime, Refuses to buy a bed pan or a tolet chair. She lives alone in her own home. She refuses to pay to have a ramp installed to her home to avoid breaking a hip falling down the stairs. I don't have the money to buy these things for her to keep living alone in her home as she demands to do. She Urines on News papers near her bed because, she can't make it to the bathroom on time. A simple bed pan or Tolet chair would help this issue. But, she refuses to spend a dime of her money. She has the money to spend to buy these things but refuses. Enough said about that. This DPOA is stopping me from doing many things that others don't seem to understand. My Aunt refuses to spend her funds proper/correct on her needs. With her actions,I'm not allowed to spend her funds on her needs without her permission. Anything that would make life easier for her she refuses. It's strange that I'm the DPOA but, I can't simply write a check using her funds to pay for the things she needs to live alone.Like a simple life alert or a bed pan without her permission to do so.She isn't thinking straight on her spending. All she wants to do is save, save and more save her money for what!...I tell her all the time,it's time to start spending your money on your needs.That's why you saved this money!..If there was ever a time to start spending your money it's now!...I can't force her to spend a dime and she refuses to do so. By her refusing makes me look like a bad caregiver & POA. Ooo yes, I'm also, her caregiver. Caregiver with DPOA, That I am!...I'm Both!..If you was ever a POA and a Caregiver "Both" at the same time? You would understand what I'm going thru. POA services and Caregiver services is two different services you offer for a client. That's what people don't seem to understand. POA services and Caregiver services is not the same job.This Caregiver job is far more then a POAs job and tasks. POAs are not allowed to be paid, charge for POA services. That's clear! I'm also, her caregiver.I wasn't told I must do this job for free!..I can't be paid/hired because, I'm her POA?I spend out of my pocket over $160 per month to see my Aunt to care for her.I can't be reinbrused for my gas cost? Unfare this POA is!...My Aunt forgets everything. She's 88 yrs old with a bad memory. She forgot her 4 dot pin for her Chase Debit card. She ran out of checks in her check book.As her DPOA I called the bank asking if I can change her PIN for her as DPOA. Can I order her new checks. The bank told me no.POAs is not allowed. My 88 yr old Aunt has to go to the bank to do all of this.
She isn't paying her bills on time. And gets confused of bills to pay & when to pay them or if she allready paid them or not. I want to setup online banking so I as her POA can keep track of her transactions. And to setup auto bill pay so she don't need to worry about paying her bills anymore. The Chase bank says I can't have access to online banking as her DPOA. The Bank manager tells me I have full access to her accounts. But, I can't setup online banking? What's full access mean? Sounds like FULL ACCESS to me doesn't it?
I hit many brick walls here doing these jobs. Something is wrong here that I'm not seeing? If I can't manage my client's financials as her DPOA. What's the purpose in this DPOA for? I don't see it!.
I'm DPOA for Healthcare and financial. I need help? I'm out of options?

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Thank you JessieBelle.
The only thing I can do about my Aunt's issues is let the ball roll.When she digs her own hole and can't get out I'll be the one there to help then.Until,then I'm stuck.
When people think of a Durable POA.They think all control of their client.That's not true on bit.The DPOA has many flaws in it that knowone realizes until they become one.Always a brick Wall with POAs.I was force to be her DPOA.Because,there was no one else to help her.Her past caregiver & POA is seating in Jail as we speak for battery to my Aunt.I never once asked for this DPOA.Her attorney felt she needed a POA so I had no choice but to do it.
I wasn't given a manual or step by step instruction on this DPOA.The attorney made it up and here I am today with no help or advice to turn to.Chase Bank wont let me have access to online banking as her DPOA.Making trips to the bank each week is a pain and cost out of my pocket.So,let the ball fall ere it may i guess.
Best,
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Lol yes I agree.I'm going nut's.Sorry for all the threads and venting.I can't seem to get a answer about these issues.I'm about ready to giveup.I'm trying to do all of this stuff the legal way.But,I'm learning knowone does this stuff legally straight.Sounds like I need to talk to someone underground in order to get anywhere.Everyone on this forum thinks they know the answers to these issues.Talking to attorneys gives another.I came to this forum because,I thought there would be other people that's been in my shoes that can give advice to help me as a DPOA.The known answer that everyone want's to give is talk to a attorney.Truth be told,anyone can give that answer.
I'm about ready to giveup seeking advice on this forum because,everyone wants to give oppinions over the topic seeking advice.
Same example as for you.You could of held your thought/oppinion just to get a word in.There was no need for you to say this to me.If you don't have a answer or can't give advice other then your opinion?Why waste your breath/time?
You think you can answer every thread on this forum is why you do what you do.
Like if you get paid to answer amount of threads per day or something.I remember you as well,Your advice was remove this POA if you recall.I'm trying my best to seek options to avoid that idea of yours.I feel in my heart,my heart tells me your a mean,hateful person deep in thought with your own issues.Thinking if you answer other's threads your'll feel better in your self.Don't accuse without claim.You have no idea who I am or the type of person I am.I'm better then you lady.
You have issues! Enjoy your day!
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I can relate, though. I've been sounding like a broken record for 4 years now. Sometimes we just need to vent our frustrations. They never seem to resolve, but only get worse.

dogabone, you can only do what you can do. You can't fix things that people won't let you. It is a huge difference between taking care of older people and children. You can boss children around. Bossing an elder is like putting your shoulder to the rump of a big ole stubborn mule that has its feet firmly planted.
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You keep asking the same thing over and over. Quite frankly, you need a therapist more than she does.
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