I asked the doctor today if my dad would qualify for hospice since I'm making his medical decisions now, and the doctor said yes because liver failure is terminal unless you get a transplant. I asked my dad if he wanted to go to a nursing home where he would continue treatment or if he wanted to go to a hospice home where he would get pain management and end of life care even if it may be several months. He agreed on the hospice. Half of me thinks I should fight to get him in a nursing home where he can continue to live, but the other half of me can't stand the idea of the rest of his life being in a place he hates fighting an organ failure no one can fix, where he'd eat food he hates, and where his whole life will consist of draining fluid from his legs and abdomen, bland low sodium food, and limited visitation during covid.
I feel like either way I am sealing his fate. If he goes to a nursing home, he could live 2 more years, but at what cost? If he goes to hospice, it'll be less than that, but he'll be more comfortable. But I want my daddy to live.
I am so sad and so lost. I want him to be out of misery, but does that really mean I need to make a decision where he may die sooner than later? Is that right?