I feel like I'm not honoring my mother in her best interest now that my brother has all the control. Now what?


I was caregiver and financial manager for my elderly mother for approximately 5 years until my brother took her to live with him a few months ago. I could not accept the manner or reasoning behind his decision. He had another agenda and whether I accepted or not, he would proceed as he wishes. I refuse anymore conversations with him for that reason, and he's livid and so angry. I refuse to turn over mom's bank accounts and personal property at this time. He's since reported me, turned my mother on me, closed her bank accounts and opened new ones with his name listed as sole beneficiary. Mother in her right mind would not do that, but she is so brainwashed, she'll sign whatever he tells he to. In the meantime, I'm stuck in an uncomfortable position I didn't ask to be in. I feel like I am not honoring my mother in her best interest, and that he has all the control. He sends demanding letters. I have seen a lawyer, but I felt worse after that consultation. My brother's been a deadbeat son for years. It sounds like he is now in charge of all of her decisions, yet there's nothing in writing legally proving he is so superior all of a sudden. He forbids me from seeing my mother, If I try to she will tell me to get away from her. My brother will get mad at her if she has anything to do with me.. Maybe someone could shine some light on what's going on and what to do with her remaining money, That would be nice.

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vshs, I came across this post you wrote in June where your sister removed your Mom from your care.


Please clarify as in another original post a few days ago, almost identical to the one you wrote above, you wrote you said that you and your brother were the only siblings.
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Do I understand correctly that you intend to withhold your mother's belongings and money from your mother; and that she has moved from a) living in her own home with you as her primary caregiver to b) living in your brother's home with your brother as her primary caregiver?

What did the lawyer say that made you feel worse? I wouldn't want to repeat it parrot-fashion.

If your mother has her own lawyers, I suppose you could ask to turn her property over to them for safe-keeping, pending clarification of your mother's competence and your brother's fitness to act for her. You do realise how very far what you're doing has placed you in the wrong, don't you?

To whom did your brother report you?

And, pace your observation that you do not accept them, what were the manner and reasoning behind your brother's decision to take your mother into his home?
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