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Mom has been admitted to a home due to dementia. I am researching foods and anything that may slow things down. She has lost a lot of ability quickly. It seems when she is at a facility, the dementia moves faster. Should I try to recommend diets or research treatments that her NH can try? Im not sure what NHs do for the residents. She just entered there, I am not local and communication is not easy. Thanks.

The short answer is no.

What the nursing home does for residents will be dependent on what each resident is capable of.

Your mum has gone downhill rapidly. That could be partly because of the unfamiliar environment, however it's more likely that this is simply the point your mum is at in her illness.

That often happens with dementia, that the sufferer will seem like their condition hasn't changed, then they suddenly become worse. It's irreversible, I'm afraid.

My mum had vascular dementia, which does go up and down. It made it difficult for some of my family to accept how ill she really was, when they saw her on a good day, or at a good time. For them it was completely unexpected and incomprehensible when she went downhill quite suddenly.

I, on the other hand, had been expecting it. I had visited Mum's residents with her, had helped out at the afternoon teas and other social events she organised for them, and I saw people change as dementia took hold. Mum explained how to talk to those particular residents and what was happening with them. (When they were no longer capable of independent living, Mum would help with their transition to a care home.)
This meant that I was able to help with compassion and understanding when it happened to Mum. It also meant that I have a similar attitude to Mum's - quality of life over quantity, every time.
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Reply to MiaMoor
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Hello kenmtb, I see in your profile that you've been posting here for around 2 years.

One of your posts was regarding PoA... did u become your Mom's PoA? If not, then she must have a court-appointed legal guardian? I'm only asking because if this is the case then this request would need to go through that guardian. FYI in my experience with LTC facilities, they do not accommodate those types of "special" diets. They may be willing to dispense supplements, if your Mom is able to swallow them safely. You would need to pay for and provide them and trust the staff will give it to her.

As all others have pointed out, there is no slowing down dementia, although not all dementias progress at the same rate but often individual differences probablhy come into play but are not known due to there being so many variables.

There is also no cure for dementia, either. Any company claiming to sell a supplement or special diet that slows or cures dementia are selling snake oil to desperate or innocent people. You have seen with your own eyes that dementia doesn't care and moves forward no matter what -- unless that person never really had dementia to begin with.

I'm so sorry you both have to be on this journey. Please don't do anything to extend her life. Quality, not quantity. I wish you peace in your heart.
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Reply to Geaton777
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I'm with others here that am wondering why you would want to slow down the progression of your moms dementia, when dementia itself is a death sentence.
And yes, dementia sucks, but sadly there is nothing that we can do or take that will stop the inevitable.
And NO ONE in their right mind would want to linger one more day with it, if given a choice.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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I'm sorry, nothing can help now. Even when noticing some slight difficulty they're going through, asking to work on puzzles or anything that could help cognitive issues is useless if they don't want to do it. This is a disease, there's no cure. The fast decline is her trying so hard to make sense of what's happening to her,along with being in an unfamiliar place. There's no stopping the inevitable decline she will continue to have, her mind is broken beyond repair. This is the hardest part for her children to understand and accept. It's out of our control, we can do nothing but make them comfortable. It may sound harsh but many times people feel better knowing the truth. The longer we fight and deny their conditions, it only hurts us as they aren't themselves anymore. I tried so hard to accept that I was powerless and cried just as much.
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Reply to JuliaH
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I agree with RR. I cannot imagine why you would want to slow things and prolong life. You are now down to the place where really your mom is lost to you; worse she is lost to herSELF and she can no longer make decisions and be in control of her life. To me it is a fate so much worse than death. I would wish only to be allowed to make my final exit. My brother, when first diagnosed with Lewy's was so clear in his wish to beat it to his brain by dying first. As things turned out he got a small sore on his shin which led to sepsis and hospice and his death within two years of diagnosis. To be honest, happily.
You cannot slow the progression of dementia and no medications are proven to do that. It is slow torture, truly.

To me it is now about comfort care. Anxiety will make this every so much worse for her, and I would attempt only to monitor her for emotional well being. In the instance of one friend whose mother has gone on for years in excellent care, medical marijuana has made all the difference in her enjoyment of her life as it is. This is in TX. and she is on a program that allows this; her appetite is better and she is more smiley, tho at this point she recognizes no one and is completely non verbal, surviving mostly on milk shakes and malted milks.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Ken, they don't do special meals for this type of thing. Heck, I don't think they even do special diets for doctors orders. Other than pureed or mechanically softened food.

Change causes progression in dementia, it is a known fact.

Unfortunately, if you want something special done, you will have to do it or hire someone to come in and do it.

I am wondering why you would want to prolong this stage of your mother's life, she is just existing and I don't personally know anyone that says keep me alive as long as possible when I am a shell with a broken brain. Everyone I know has said, let me go when I am already gone.

I am sorry that you are facing losing your mom, it is hard no matter our age.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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Nothing slows down the progress. No foods or Medications. Some Medications may help in the beginning but not as desease progresses. And if Mom is already into the desease, why would you want to slow the progression down? I had a parent with Dementia. It was hard watching her decline but I never would have wanted her in that state for a long time. Its terminal. No cure.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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I’m sorry your mom is going through this and you’re having sadness adjusting to the changes in her. Dementia marches forward no matter the diet or treatments. Sadly, it’s a devastating condition. Rest in the knowledge she’s safe and cared for, visit as you’re able, and try to gain acceptance of what cannot be fixed. Your mom is blessed to have your love and caring.
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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lifestyle changes should have happened years before dementia. The time for meds should have happened in early dementia and prescribed by a physician. Once the moderate stage begins, then those meds are taken off because there is no way to reverse progress, just a few extra months of quality of life.
Ken, I suspect that you were not much in mom's life when the changes started? Perhaps you lived far away from mom? At least being in a facility will keep mom safe. If she was in MC before a NH, she would have had enrichment programs geared to her decline. NH's offer these programs as well though on a lesser scale
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Reply to MACinCT
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