What do you do when you have a parent who has always had some mental illness and then they start to get dementia? My mother's mental illness was never diagnosed because outside of the home she appeared to be high functioning, but inside the home was another matter. Emotional problems and hoarding issues. I think there's always been a personality disorder but also something else which I have no idea what to name. Now as doctors try to determine how much mental function she has lost it is hard to tell them exactly how much she has declined because she was never normal to begin with. And problems like her hoarding that were once not mine to control because she was technically an adult free to make her own bad choices, suddenly are now my business in the eyes of medical professionals. She's still legally competent even now, but she's also not well - how does one stand on this fine line and do the right thing?