How to decline to serve as the named agent?

No I was already one. My dad is driving me crazy. He has mental problems (same as my daughter) and he is yelling, cuzing and everything else, trying to get me out of his way. But see he has for 50 years treated me wrong, beat me in my younger years, has never treated me like his child. (he has two others that is he babies) well, I sent out letters to them and walked away. My next 30 to 40 years will be in peace. I know that is all the years I have left. I am a diabetic and now 50. His two babies, can take care of him (the are much younger then I) I had, had it.

What are you really asking? The word "NO" I cannot serve as a medical power of attorney comes to mind. Is this your question?

DaveIFM, I am confused of what you are saying. Please Explain Thank you

can health care-organizations REVEAL if a person has POA and proxies on file?

I understand you can provide information to them even if they can't acknowledge the person is a patient or give you patient data unless you have their HIPAA release

Under the regulations of HIPAA can health care-organizations if a person has POA and proxies on file?

Just today, I sent the letters out to the parents and their dr's letting them know I was stepping down from their medical power of attorney. It is finale. Now time to start my healing, loving people helping me with that. Also I like to Thank all here for the support you have showing me a stranger. Thank you

Best wishes to you, toxicfamilymemb. Please let us know when things calm down for you. You deserve some peace. It is so kind of you to be looking out for your mother's interest as best you can.

jeannegibbs, Yes, I have to give it up. For my own mental and physical health. As it is right now, I have not been to bed since 6:30am Monday morning. I have my own health problems, that need to be taken care of and with the things I am going through with what my dad is doing, is not helping my own health. I have gotten the papers drawed up and ready to mail. I am stepping down from both parents MPOA, but first going to Health and Human services and asking for the state to step and take Guardian of her. So she will be taken care of and all. If dad does the same thing with them, he will go to jail or mental ward. This would be the only way, to teach him he can't do this. So for my own health, I have to do this. Because of the state I have been in, it is even worrying my husband. He is seeing me going back to being like I was before when my dad caused me to go into a nerves brake down and my husband and kids almost lost me then. So yes, I have to do this. Thank you for explaining everything and asking.

The named agent is the person who can make medical decisions for the principal when she cannot make the decisions herself. It is not the person who takes care of her. You can withdraw from day-to-day care but still be able to act on her behalf if, for example, she were hospitalized and certain decisions need to be made.

Are you sure you want to give up that role?

No know one is secondary. Mom never wanted her husband of other kids to be. They only care for them self and rather she would die so they did not have to care for her. So they can take anything she has (that they already did with in 6 months of Dr. stating what was wrong with mom) But I can't take it any longer with him around. With in 6 months her husband and other kids tore up got rid of all her directive, wills and all. Then they illigally made them self her MPOA, it took me 9 months to get it back to where it was to be, with help of Dr. she at the time had only days to live if she got no help. But I have my own health problems and he causing some of them to get worst. I have to walk away. Her clinic won't help of give you answer, don't tried that way. Been to court, but think I have to go back and don't have money to do that. I am thinking about calling Department of Health and Human services and see if they will help me. I just don't know how about getting out of this.

Ah, you are already named in your mother's health care directive, and now you do not wish to carry out that duty. Telling your mother isn't effective because she has dementia, and you do not have a workable relationship with your father. Is he her power of attorney?

I don't know how to handle this. I hope someone will pop in with a clear-cut answer.

One possibility, and what I would do in your shoes, is to contact the main place where her health care directive is filed -- for example, the clinic of her primary care physician. Explain that you know you are named in your mother's healthcare directive and that you need to withdraw from that role and ask their advice on how to handle this.

Is someone named as a backup or secondary agent? Then if the occasion arises that a decision is needed and you decline to provide it, the secondary can step in.

There is a problem with that, she has dementia and it is my father is causing me the hurt and nerves brake down. I have been her MPOA for years. I have to do it legally. But don't know how to go about doing it.

There is a problem with that, she has dementia and it is my father is causing me the hurt and nerves brake down. I have been her MPOA for years. I have to do it legally. But don't know how to go about doing it.

Say "No."
"No thank you."
"I am sorry but I cannot take on that responsibility."
"I am sorry. I don't think I could in good faith represent carry out your directive."
"I couldn't possibly do that."
"I wish you well, but you'll have to find someone with healthcare views closer to your own to play that role."

Basically, you just say no and give as much or as little of an explanation as you care to.

I hope this is happening before the medical need arises -- that you have been asked while the healthcare directive is being drawn up.

Maybe I am not understanding the question. Can you explain a little more?